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nudesunguy
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 Posted - 12/21/2013 : 11:28:48 AM
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[I posted this earlier, but it seems to have been lost, so I'll try again].
I recently "came out" to a friend that I was a nudist. She surprised me by saying that she used to be a nudist also, and I mean a serious nudist who lived part-time at a nudist resort with her then husband and daughter. I told her about the local beach we go to, and she said she would never go to a nude beach or resort. Her current husband has no idea she was ever a nudist.
We know another couple, the man of which used to be a member at a nudist club and raised his kids there (we heard this from other friends). After he got divorced from his nudist wife, his new wife wasn't into it so he never went back to the club, ever.
I realize people do change, but this seems sort odd to me…to have something be such a big part of your family life and then toss it completely away. Maybe they associate nudity with the dreaded ex-spouse. Does anyone else know of similar cases?
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Nudony
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Posted - 12/22/2013 : 12:10:39 AM
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Hmmm...yes. Technically my ex-wife is an ex-nudist. And I know her pretty well! :)
Without going into all the details (I do tend to ramble), here's the gist of it. My ex started off as a reluctant spouse. After much debating and encouragement, she started joining us (our daughter and me) in being nude at home, eventually adopting home-nudism for herself.
Her journey to social nudism was a bit more complex. Being nude among strangers was a "heck no!" for her initially. But after we relocated, she met some nudist women that had a profound impact on her. And so she went from "sarong-strapped" reluctant wife to "enthusiastically naked" nudist wife and Mom in a relative short time with the support and encouragement of these women; and my encouragement as well.
I've often recounted anecdotes where my ex helped out and supported "terrorized" newbies/reluctant wives; or brazenly "came out" as a nudist to various people. Or volunteered to organize and lead clothesfree activities at resorts or get-togethers. People noticed her not just because of her nudity; but because of her comfort and positive/perky attitude about being socially nude.
But...all was not well in Nudonyland. We had been struggling as a couple for a while; and faced with her dissatisfaction - not just with our marriage but also herself - my wife decided that nudism was "part of the problem." And that was that. A few short years later we separated.
I'm still in very good terms with my ex; as a matter of fact I'm staying with her for Xmas. She does not have negative feelings about nudism; but to her that's a closed chapter of her life. It was something tied to her relationship with me; and thus was not something to be pursued for herself without me. I think that many married nudist guys would find that their spouse would in fact drop out of nudism if they left/divorced/died. Women, I believe, have a much more emotional approach to nudism than us guys.
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FireProf
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Posted - 12/22/2013 : 03:15:41 AM
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Yah ... we know/knew a couple that used to vacation with our group each year at a resort in Palm Springs. They/she was mostly into "new things" to try after a heart attack and bypass surgery. She felt she had to try everything at least once.
They bought a motorhome, bought a membership into a local club, went every weekend, vacationed there til she got tired of "camping." Then they visited the resort, that's where we met them, and did that for several years and then kinda fell off the radar. We visited them at their home after they fell off the radar. She made sure to tell us that their home was NOT a nude home. It didn't bother us. We went out, I talked to him, she talked to my wife and I later found out that though she didn't mind going to nude places and enjoyed being nude from time to time, she didn't much care to see her husband naked all the time. She was a bit weird. hahaha
Two others that were "technically" nudists but are no longer are our daughters. At the age of 12, they both stopped being naked all the time at home. They've kinda taken it back up but we wouldn't classify them as "nudists" at this time.
Loves being naked. Plays well with others!
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Edited by - FireProf on 12/22/2013 10:56:37 AM |
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Diger
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Posted - 12/22/2013 : 09:48:10 AM
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Angie's sister, my SIL use to live in Hawaii when she was in the service. She use to go to the nude beach there but not sure of her habits of dress at home then. She says back then she was worth looking at but no one want's to see her now. She has weight issues, both of us have told her it was about enjoying yourself and distressing but not about being seen. We have had no luck with her, the only thing remotely encouraging is she loves to use our outdoor shower when were not here. LOL
Not sure if we could really count her, cause I believe she may have just been into it for the thrill. Not saying that's a bad thing, a lot of us have that motive as we begin but find out how relaxing it is and how much we enjoy just enjoy being naked.
Good thread Nudesunguy, It has been interesting.
Diger
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Edited by - Diger on 12/22/2013 09:57:33 AM |
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nudesunguy
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Posted - 12/22/2013 : 12:27:35 PM
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Nudony, I remember reading about your (ex) wife in other threads. Amazing that someone so into nudism would at some point just say that chapter's done. Not to pry, but I am curious why she thought nudism was "part of the problem" with your marriage? PM me if you'd rather not post it publicly.
I do think you are correct that many women would drop out if their hubby was no longer on the scene. My wife has actually stated that. And in the case of another nudist friend, she met a new (non nudist) boyfriend recently, and she has disappeared from the beach she used to love.
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Nudony
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Posted - 12/24/2013 : 08:49:32 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by nudesunguy
Nudony, I remember reading about your (ex) wife in other threads. Amazing that someone so into nudism would at some point just say that chapter's done. Not to pry, but I am curious why she thought nudism was "part of the problem" with your marriage?
Whoah...now that's a loaded question! LOL!
The short version is...there were a lot of external influences that affected my wife's "satisfaction" with our lives and herself after we relocated. She decided that the only way she was going to be happy was to have a totally mainstream, "normal" suburban middle class lifestyle. She began feeling that social nudism was too "alternative" to be compatible with such a lifestyle - in spite of her actual appreciation of it.
On another level, part of it was also "you're not going to get what you want unless I'm happy" reaction towards my personal needs.
This is nothing knew though. I've heard of/spoken with other people whose spouse dropped out of nudism because they suddenly felt it just "wasn't normal." Often also from nudist Moms that decide that beyond a certain age, it's not "normal" anymore for the kid(s) to see their Mom/Dad nude. Sometimes there is a need for "normalcy", or rather conformism, that overrides or represses eventually the desire to be socially nude.
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nudesunguy
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Posted - 12/24/2013 : 12:59:55 PM
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Sorry, it wasn't meant to be loaded ;-). Thanks for responding.
Very interesting that she felt nudism was too alternative. I guess most people do get more conservative with age. I know in the case of my wife, encounters with swingers at nudist venues (which seems to be happening more and more) makes her less enthusiastic about nudity in general.
We have a friend whose wife stopped coming to our local beach because she decided she was too fat (we couldn't even tell she had gained weight). I suspect the real reason was more inline with your wife's feelings.
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Does anyone else know ex-nudists?
