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| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| Deucer |
Posted - 06/08/2009 : 08:22:49 AM
My wife and I are both 39 with 13yo boy and 11yo girl. We are interested in joining a local nudist resort but are somewhat worried about their ages and thoughts.
I frequented nude beaches, bare bun fun runs, clothing optional hot springs and swims on my own from 18-22, when I met my soon to be wife. She was raised very conservatively. At 24 I talked her going to a couple places, and she was surprised to like it. At 25 we had our boy and we both got too busy to go. At 31 9/11 happened and we decided to enjoy life. We went to hot springs on own and enjoyed it still. So we have taken the kids twice a summer since then. At their ages they jet followed parents. But where we go is quiet, it has often been just family for some of the time. When others are there, everything has gone smoothly. Kids love it and dont even think of it as odd, they are below the water much of tye time. This summer they will be older - 13 boy and 11 girl. By
only do we plan to go to hot springs this summer, wife and I are talking about jointing a club just she and I go to once a year together. She is worried our boy will feel strange and get erections. I told her that nudists don't get erections because naturism is not about sex. I have never seen an erection at a nudist place. Of course I don't go often. I have been doing some research, not much, and have read that erections do in fAct occur quite routinely. I would like to know if this is in fact true. Young boys? Teens? Men? I can in understand in teens but I never even got close to one so I am surprised even disappinted. I liked how innocent the places seem. Again I told the wife that they don't happen and she has no reason to think I'm wrong since she never saw one while there. By the way I am worried that our boy might be susseptable to erections sine last summer he got one at the hot springs for the first time. He wispered it to me when I asked him to help me start lunch so I let him stay in water until it went away. I never told my wife. I just figured it may have been the warm water creating the erection as that has happened to me, but at my age, I can control it better. It may have instead been the older teenagers in the next pool over.
So I guess what I am asking long windedly is what are the chances a 13yo will get an erection in public? A 39yo? What's the best way to ask them to join mom and dad in this lifestyle, or do we just drag them there whether they like it fully or not and say it's an adult decision, kids don't vote? Will it be more difficult on tye girl than the boy? Thanks! Any suggestions are apreciated! |
| 15 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| MikeinFL10 |
Posted - 08/21/2015 : 1:02:50 PM
Understand your dilemma. But got a boy and girl thru all that (nude) with little trouble and lots of fun
Get with me I can help |
| sailawaybob |
Posted - 06/24/2013 : 12:45:46 AM
if a teen is willing to go to a nudist camp/resort take them , kids aren't usually required to be nude unless they go into the pool, but they can get use to nudism at their own pace and other kids will help them get comfortable. |
| Erin948 |
Posted - 06/21/2013 : 5:27:29 PM
Thanks for the response, Everytime i look at my son hes walking around with frequent erections. I hope we can find a good way to deal with it. Hes been fine with nudity up until now. Your responses were pretty helpful. Things are difficult for both of us at the moment. Thanks, |
| JCP |
Posted - 06/21/2013 : 4:53:11 PM
From what I've read on forums and Naturist sites there seems to be real atrophy amongst adolescents and I think it's a great shame. In the UK you have to be 18 to join Young Naturists and that seems to be missing the point. Teenagers exist through unity and shared experience. They want to hang around in like minded groups and reinforce their belief systems.
I haven't come across any group that empower teenagers in Naturism and deals with their specific needs, just families on their own in what tends to be dispersed community when not congregated at a beach or club.
As a fourteen year old boy I'm sure pressures from the more active interests his 'textile' friends have, awareness of his developing sexuality and external taboos from outside the Naturist community are having their toll.
You could suggest a skinny dipping party for all his mates and try and bring them to him but the chances are you would be locked up.
Personally, I think teenagers need adult guidance more than at any other time. Their not meant to exist and were never designed in nature to be trapped between childhood and belonging to the adult community. They need help with that but it seems to be a time when parents want to step back a little and give them the independence society has deemed they can't have.
As my stepson went through his teens we had a very open relationship. It led to too much information being received at times and his habit of peeing with the bathroom door open but the upside was the more he understood his behaviour was natural and what he did was not a slap in the face of family and normal development the less his cause was a revolution. I think we rode those years well and the fact that even at eighteen he would happily give his mother and I a hug and a kiss in spite of his mates jeering looks still makes me feel proud.
I hope you don't feel this is a crude answer but it certainly matches my research and experience. Don't just except that erections are part of teenage life, acknowledge they have a purpose and discuss them with him.
A good way to prevent an unwanted erection is to find a private place and masturbate. That's what his hormones are trying to tell him and so should you, not his peers, not urban legend but his parents.
Erections are part of his claim to a new adult body, he should be proud that it's all working. Flaunting is socially unacceptable but having one shouldn't be. It's not his responsibility to look embarrassed, it's other's responsibility
to look away.
I don't believe in super human Naturists with no sexual response, they learn appropriate behaviour.
Appropriate behaviour for a fourteen year old boy is having and erection,.
Buy him a star chart 
Hope this is helpful, non of its advertising, just research I've been doing for my books.
http://www.nudist-resorts.org/talk/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=5186
http://www.sevencounties.org/poc/view_doc.php?type=doc&id=41181&cn=1310
http://pw1.netcom.com/~docx2/USB1.htm
http://www2.hu-berlin.de/sexology/ATLAS*EN/html/sexual*activity*in*adolescence.html
http://askdrrobert.dr-robert.com/incest2.html
http://www.stopitnow.org/age*appropriate*sexual_behavior
http://www.mnadopt.org/Factsheets/Recognizing%20Healthy%20&%20Unhealthy%20Sexual%20Development%20in%20Children.pdf
http://www.misterpoll.com/polls/180108/results
http://www.youthandleadership.com/articles/masturbation
http://forums.govteen.com/h-d-general-information-faq/333231-jonathans-guide-boys-puberty-v2.html
http://puberty101.com/boys/am-i-gay/
http://www.healthlibrary.com/book37_chapter377.htm
http://www.handsonscotland.co.uk/topics/sexual_issues/general.html
http://www.nspcc.org.uk/help-and-advice/for-parents-and-carers/parenting-advice/child-sexual-behaviour/child-sexual-behaviour_wda92604.html
http://www.sylviakneal.com/articles/normal-sexual-behavior-in-children.php
http://www.desertviewsas.org/reactiveyouth.php
http://www.education.com/reference/article/Ref*What*Normal/
http://brightfutures.aap.org/pdfs/Guidelines_PDF/9-Promoting-Healthy-Sexual-Development.pdf
http://www.fairfaxcounty.gov/dfs/childrenyouth/sexualbehaviorchildren.htm
http://www.actforyouth.net/health_sexuality/adolescence/sexual.cfm
More than happy for anybody to contact me directly but please be prepared to be open about who you are. I will discuss any aspect of my research in the strictist confidence. If something concerns you I've probably read what the professionals think and can either direct you to them or paraphrase.
dalmatianjones@gmail.com
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| Erin948 |
Posted - 06/21/2013 : 4:44:14 PM
We are at the point where my teenage son has just started getting frequent erections. They are embarrassing for him and as of late hes wanted to start wearing clothes at home because of it. Have been thinking about joining a nudist resort this summer, maybe to put his mind at ease and make him feel better about himself but not sure how we would handle him walking around like that if hes going to get frequent erections. |
| JCP |
Posted - 06/19/2013 : 8:18:22 PM
Sorry, when I say you it's 'everybody', nothing personal. New to this forum experience. |
| JCP |
Posted - 06/19/2013 : 8:14:52 PM
Thank you for your reply.
I appreciate the heads up about Amazon.
Naturism is a theme in my books but a complimentary one not the central one. I have given as open a description of myself and my objectives in my profile, it will explain where I'm coming from.
I want to say to the world, take note, adolescent sexuality is not taboo and should be discussed. Abusers will often step in to answer the questions children/adolescents have about sexual function. I'm trying to say, if you want a model for a healthy open environment where taboo is balanced with reality look at Naturists. This forum is the first honest and open discussion I've found. You wouldn't believe how many Naturist organisations have child protection policies but won't acknowledge childhood sexuality. If you won't discuss what's normal how can you fully protect from the abnormal? Passionate about this one
JCP |
| sailawaybob |
Posted - 06/19/2013 : 7:52:30 PM
JCP there are a million book written on nudism - check out amazon , to a lot of people nudism is a fad someting to do, same with kids who are raised in a nudist enviroment some will stay with it as they grow into adulthood but i think more will leave, move on to new interest. my two kids moved on one won't talk about it and one will bring it up occasionally but has no interest in it anymore. |
| JCP |
Posted - 06/19/2013 : 6:51:43 PM
Hi, I am researching a novel that has adolescent boys as the main characters and naturism as a theme.
Did you come to any conclusion?
Did your wife accept a revised acceptance of adolescent sexual development?
If you went ahead did your son cope?
Is it worth writing a novel about the subject, will it help adolescents and parents to cope with the realities?
I'm also looking for readers to offer constructive criticism, fancy a preview?
I welcome responses from anybody with a constructive opinion - please feel free to use my email.
All the best JCP |
| allnaturalwife |
Posted - 03/21/2013 : 5:39:30 PM
If this is a legitimate post I have several issues with the poster:
1. If you are so "pro nudity" why have you exposed your children to it so infrequently?
2. You were "too busy" to go to nudist venues? Also too busy to be nude in your own home?
3. Why do you treat nudism as something you "DO" as opposed to something you "ARE"
4.You are worried about your 13 year old boy getting an erection? Maybe if he was around nudity from age 0 to 13...he might be more used to it.
These are some of the pertinent questions I always ask when I see anyone post about introducing pre-teens and/or teens to nudism. I just feel its an odd time to "get into a completely new way of life" Or if you view nudism as an "activity" then it is an even worse time to "try' it with kids at that age.
I feel VERY strongly about this issue. Your children have already been around for 10-13 years and you haven't made them comfortable with nudity, you have dropped the ball already. Not saying it is impossible to introduce a teenager to nudism, but again if it is important to you as a parent that your children be comfortable with nudity..why didn't you start that from day 1??
Jenn, proud mother of three grown daughters who live their lives as nudists, and will pass on this way of life to their current/future children:) |
| outdoorfun1 |
Posted - 03/20/2013 : 08:20:06 AM
I agree with the above, when our nephew first joined us, it was a bit difficult for him in the beginning, being a teenage boy. He would also have spontaneous erections around my wife and daughter, luckily my wife is very calm about things like that, we all had a very mature chat about it and that put him at ease. He does have them every now still, it is part of life, the big thing is not to make a fuss about it. As I told him, if it happens, don't draw attention to it, it will gradually subside and another plus point is that it still functions like it should. |
| SyncVA |
Posted - 10/01/2010 : 12:52:00 AM
Of course he will get erections! He's going through puberty! I'd talk to him openly and honestly about it. Good suggestions above about managing it in a gentlemanly manner and suggesting his sister not tease him about it. She'll get used to it, soon enough, as will he.
Remember, most people in naturist environments have probably encountered a spontaneous erection before, and should be familiar with how easily they can occur during puberty... If he acts with some maturity about it, he'll learn to shrug it off (or even joke about it) soon enough. "What can I say? Puberty." |
| blavan |
Posted - 09/17/2010 : 4:11:29 PM
Yes, he will get erections because he is a teenage boy, and his hormones are raging. It is normal, so he should be informed that it is normal, and that it is nothing to be worried about.
His having an erection can be a teachable moment for you the parents to continue the process of showing him how to be a gentleman, and not behave in a manner that would cause anyone to feel uncomfortable. Erections come and erections also eventually always go away. You can help him through this, and not deny the whole family the experience of visiting nudists resorts together.
We frequent a family nudist resort where there are many children of all ages including teenage boys. We have never observed a problem, and we have seen some erections managed very well.
Being Naked and Being Real |
| nudeguy |
Posted - 09/12/2009 : 3:12:50 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Deucer
I have been doing some research, not much, and have read that erections do in fAct occur quite routinely. I would like to know if this is in fact true. Young boys? Teens? Men? I can in understand in teens but I never even got close to one so I am surprised even disappinted. I liked how innocent the places seem. Again I told the wife that they don't happen and she has no reason to think I'm wrong since she never saw one while there. By the way I am worried that our boy might be susseptable to erections sine last summer he got one at the hot springs for the first time. He wispered it to me when I asked him to help me start lunch so I let him stay in water until it went away. I never told my wife. I just figured it may have been the warm water creating the erection as that has happened to me, but at my age, I can control it better. It may have instead been the older teenagers in the next pool over.
So I guess what I am asking long windedly is what are the chances a 13yo will get an erection in public?
Duecer, teenage boys get spontaneous erections very often and anywhere they happen to be. Showing up nude in public where there also happens to be warm water, a nice breeze, and naked females romping about is going to make your son's arousal significantly more likely. I recommend that you refrain from insisting to your wife that erections don't occur at nudist venues, particularly among teenagers, because that statement is way off the mark.
You commented that you didn't mention anything to your wife about your son's erection in the water ("I never told my wife.") The boy is very likely able to sense your need for secrecy in this matter and that fact alone will make him uneasy about it, or even ashamed.
The next time he gets an erection in your presence, be casual about it. Tell him it's part of life, there's nothing wrong with having one, he's a totally normal boy and there is no need to be embarassed. But do emphasize the need to behave appropriately if (when) it happens around others, by not waving it around like a big flag and to just ignore it if he can't readily hide it. Not bringing others' attention to it is the best course of action. If someone does notice, he should stay cool as if nothing is going on.
And as one poster already suggested, make sure your daughter does not make fun of him if (when) she sees him with an erection. Thirteen year old boys can be very sensitive about those comments.
I also advise having a talk with "the wife" and admit the information you gave her is not entirely correct. She will almost surely spot your son with an erection one day at the resort. She needs to know he's having them, and providing correct information on the topic will lessen her shock and embarassment. If your wife knows how likely and normal erections are for a young teenage boy, she can take it in stride when it does occur and not make your son feel bad about an uncontrollable body function.
This discussion reminds me of something Jay Leno said during a monologue a few years back. He mentioned a news report about teenagers experimenting with Viagra to get high. He concluded with, "Viagra??? At that age, kids ARE Viagra!" |
| sailawaybob |
Posted - 08/12/2009 : 10:45:32 PM
my two boys were raised as nudist from almost infants till they turned teens, they enjoyed going to the nudist resorts and swimming and playing with their friends but when they became teens they along with the other teens started to disappear, i don't believe it was the hangup about being nude but because they were teens and now had other interest. you will have a better chance with the eleven year old than the thirteen year old, but i wouldn't worry about the erections as most kids are playing and having fun i think some may have a erection and don't even notice. but i would give him and her the opportunity to go. |
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