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 Suggested Rules Of Behavior
 Nudist suggested rules of behavior: too strict?

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T O P I C    R E V I E W
Nudony Posted - 01/23/2005 : 08:57:25 AM
My wife is a touchy-feely kind of gal. She likes to openly display her affection for me, with non-sexual acts such as sitting on my lap, laying her head accross my stomach when we watch TV, etc...When we first got into nudism, she thought she could do the same, as she would do anywhere else. And I had to quickly explain to her why she couldn't sit on my back to apply suntan lotion, sit across my legs in the hot tub, or use me as a biggyback flotation device in the pool; which are all things we would do pretty much anywhere else. I don't think she ever really "digested" the fact that she couldn't be the same wife towards her husband at the resort; and I think her interest in the lifestyle suffered because of it.

I think that in our efforts to separate our lifestyle from anything remotely sexual, we may have gone a little too far. Some things are obvious: grabbing your partner's butt, walking with an erection in plain view, sitting on your partner's groin in the hot tub are all no-no's. But we have extended that rule to almost all body contact. And I think that is one of the main reason a lot of textiles consider us to be hypocrites. If my daughter can jump on my back and catch a biggyback to the showers, or give me an affectionate full body hug, why can't my wife?

Just food for thought...
15   L A T E S T    R E P L I E S    (Newest First)
single-dad Posted - 04/02/2012 : 12:26:16 PM
allnaturewife, I agree with you, evn tho I have not yet been to a naturist club. I rasised the same question last night as a topic in the forum. Thank you for answering my question. I would not be able to ask a lady to dance slow, but if she asked me, I might. I would have to wait 10 years tho since my son is only 6 to leave him by himself at night for a couple hours.

Mark

Live life bare it is the only way to be.
allnaturalwife Posted - 01/31/2007 : 2:51:26 PM
Having been to - - with both my husband and family many many times...I have noticed some very innapropraite behaviour. Such as VERY dirty dancing, groping and the like. I dont think you can call the police though, as it is a PRIVATE resort. I think the only "recourse" for the behaviors is to notify staff and/or management. And honestly, I doubt the staff would come out to the spa at 2 am and kick a couple off the property who were "fooling around" especially if that SAME couple was spending thousands of dollars to stay at the resort. They know what their "bread and butter are". Otherwise the nightclub and bar at that resort wouldnt be a "haven for swingers". Like I have said many times..Its the "swinging undertones" and "hints of swinging" at these resorts that are the grey areas. Obviously people having a "full blown orgy in the pool" is a black and white issue. But in the nightclubs..all of the borderline dancing..and the overall "tone" of a sexual element..are MUCH more difficult to control. There is NO easy solution. Resorts such as - - SHOULD be able to entertain BOTH demographics, but they have become a "swingers resort that tolerates nudists"..in my opinion.

Jennifer
StuffedTiger Posted - 01/30/2007 : 11:25:36 PM
IMHO, a big resort such as - - should be able to handle family-oriented and adult-oriented activities and keep them apart without having the entire resort be dedicated completely to one or the other. Irrespective of that, would not public sex be illegal at - -? All of the places mentioned seemed to me to be public places, like a restaurant or hotel swimming pool would be. In general, isn't public sex prohibited at a restaurant or hotel swimming pool unless it is private, that is, closed to the general public? If so, there is no need for the AANR here. Just call the police and file a complaint.
NakedAmbition Posted - 01/30/2007 : 11:57:43 AM
Myself, I prefer a little mystery to sex and don't need to see it right in front of me. However, maybe AANR's ongoing support of - - and other "edgy" resorts has to do with common sense. Look at it this way: 299,920,000 Americans are of the opinion that nudity OF COURSE is related to sex, versus 80,000 American nudists (50,000 AANR members and- let's be generous- another 30,000 non-AANR affiliated nudists) who say nudism has nothing to do with sex. And I'm not even subtracting those nudists with more liberal attitudes on the nudism/sex relationship. But of course it's the 299 million plus Americans who are wrong.

Wake up, folks. AANR doesn't need to preach to the converted; it wants to reach out to Americans who haven't yet tried nudism. So, while it does expend lots of energy promoting the ideal of innocent, family-friendly nudism (which is important to do), AANR also realizes that the bulk of Americans blur the line between sex and nudism, and so it subtly markets to those folks as well, by not cutting off its support of the edgier resorts that capture the curiousity of those potential first-timers looking for something "adventurous" to try with their spouses. And I'm not so sure this is a bad thing. After all, "adventurous" first timers might morph into more traditional nudists later.

To keep everyone happy (or, at least, happier), the solution is pretty simple. AANR should continue to vigorously extoll the virtues of family-friendly nudism, but then- in a lower voice, off in the background- also give helpful information about the more adult oriented clubs out there for those interested in them. It should just make sure that such clubs are clearly labeled as such.

Jim in Boston Posted - 11/08/2006 : 10:05:37 PM
Nothing to do with dancing, although we do at Club O. But people from Europe who claim to be "nudists" often don't match our expectations. We spent a week at a nudist resort on Spain, amongst people we identified as British and German. These folks would be naked around the pool all day, come to the bar for happy hour naked, then go back to their units and get dressed for dinner. And I mean dressed: they would have been fine on the streets of Munchen. No pareos. So here we were, dressed as nature suggests and these now textiles come into the resturant and look askanse at us. This was not the fault of Costa Natura, but it is likely to reduce the number of times we come back.
allnaturalwife Posted - 11/08/2006 : 6:07:48 PM
AANR is made of of many,many nudists in the US. In fact, I rarely meet long time nudists that are not members. AANR offers discounts to all of us at the various resorts and parks in the country. AANR is not so much the problem. It is resorts passing themselves off as family nudist resorts when they are more clearly adult oriented resorts that allow nudity. Again AANR is a great organization that fights for the rights of nudists and is a huge asset to us all. Its the resrort owners that misrepresent themselves to everybody. I would never boycott AANR for keeping an innappropriate resort on their list of resorts they endorse. That would hurt my family by more than it would prove any sort of point.

Jenn
old hippie Posted - 11/08/2006 : 5:23:26 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Cheri

quote:
Originally posted by allnaturalwife

Cheri, Many reports have been made regarding the behavior at - - to AANR,but to date I still see the resort endorced by AANR as a family resort. As - - is probably the most up-scale "nudist" resort in the country I doubt that AANR would be quick to drop it from their endorsement. It looks too good on the outside and all the fancy ammenities are appealing to people on the surface. You dont know until you stay there and experience for yourself the innapropriate environment. By then you already paid for your visit and it is too late. Further more the resort will always have the bulk of its revenue generated form the swinger/party crowd. If EVERY SINGLE legitimate nudist stopped attending they would only loose about 25% of their main income. And this loss would quickly be regenarated by a new crop of swingers and lifestyles vistors. Bottom line is - - doesnt NEED to change anything. They are making a ton of money with the status quo.



Jenn, There may be informal notices and reports, but has anyone filled out an official document supplied by the AANR office. Just a letter won't cut it.
Cheri

Doing what I can to positively promote nudism
-
-




. Now, to my way of thinking, that sounds like the sort of bureaucratic nonsense that causes people to be upset with their organization. If there have indeed been numerous complaints, of a credible nature, from responsible people, then why should an umbrella organization ignore the members' complaints just because it wasn't on the proper form?
. I know Cheri would not dismiss the comment of someone on this forum just because it was misspelled or lacked grammar; cannot the AANR get its act together to check out complaints which might reflect on the reputation of AANR?
. When I complain to any business that I deal with, it makes no difference if I call, write, or e-mail. the complaint is handled. Maybe I don't always like the resolution, but at least it is handled. If not, I take my business elsewhere. But it sounds like there is no 'elsewhere' to go; could this be the reason?

Hippie (in curmudgeon hat)

Dum vivimus, vivamus!
calmnude Posted - 10/28/2006 : 01:45:22 AM
It is all about money and the glamour of an upscale resort being nudist.

No matter that many clubs offer much of the same amenities, glitz sells.

I just feel badly for families who don't do their homework and get caught in uncomfortable situations.
allnaturalwife Posted - 10/27/2006 : 5:35:03 PM
Well I myself as well as a many of our friends have complained extensively to AANR. I have spoken with the AANR President about this when he was at our club this past summer. But to this day AANR supports - - on their website.
Tuffers Posted - 10/27/2006 : 4:08:07 PM
From my side of the "pond" that's exactly the question I am asking myself. At least you in USA get to hear about a resort's reputation before you spend your hard earnt dollars!! Luckily, through your and others advice I have been warned, Jenn. Would it make any difference if many US nudists who have experienced adversely - - wrote to AANR. There seems enough just on this forum. Could they then ignore the problem?

Mike
allnaturalwife Posted - 10/27/2006 : 3:28:22 PM
If thats the case though. How come to this day - - stiil passes itself off as a family nudist resort and is still endorsed by AANR?
Tuffers Posted - 10/26/2006 : 4:30:13 PM
That is heartening news Veal. Our UK Naturist holiday company makes no mention on their website as to the resort of - - as being ideal family venue but does regarding Cypress Cove. Perhaps they know more than they would let on if I was to book. It may be worth me making some descreet enquiries!!

Mike
vealj Posted - 10/26/2006 : 3:21:31 PM
quote:
Originally posted by allnaturalwife

Cheri, Many reports have been made regarding the behavior at - - to AANR,but to date I still see the resort endorced by AANR as a family resort. As - - is probably the most up-scale "nudist" resort in the country I doubt that AANR would be quick to drop it from their endorsement. It looks too good on the outside and all the fancy ammenities are appealing to people on the surface. You dont know until you stay there and experience for yourself the innapropriate environment. By then you already paid for your visit and it is too late. Further more the resort will always have the bulk of its revenue generated form the swinger/party crowd. If EVERY SINGLE legitimate nudist stopped attending they would only loose about 25% of their main income. And this loss would quickly be regenarated by a new crop of swingers and lifestyles vistors. Bottom line is - - doesnt NEED to change anything. They are making a ton of money with the status quo.



Actually, AANR has a very set procedure for investigating these types of complaints both at the regional and national levels through their Internal Administration committees. This process does, however, take time and is conducted confidentially. I can say that AANR will definitely terminate the charter of any club not living up to family nudist standards i.e. passing a swinger's club off as a family nudist resort. I can personally think of five clubs I know about that have been kicked out of AANR for this very reason and I'm sure there have been many more over the years.



Take care and ...
Keep it Bare !!!
- veal
Web:http://www.vealj.com/naturist.html
Nudist Blog: http://360.yahoo.com/vealj
Jim in Boston Posted - 10/25/2006 : 9:56:59 PM
Hey, folks, are we grown ups or not? Real nudists are or should be capable of acting in a civilized fashion, even when in close proximity to friends or nearly friends, and even when not hidden by textiles. As Jenn sez, it is the prudes who have problems with the opposite sex.

That said: we have been to nudist resorts in Europe where the local clientele insists in dressing for dinner. Makes no sense to us, but they do it and they don't seem to like it when we turn up naked at the resturant. I can see how they would have a problem with Club Fred. Just outside of their experience. Maybe these folks from Europe are not really nudists: just tourists who like to get naked at the beach...
allnaturalwife Posted - 10/25/2006 : 2:11:14 PM
quote:
Originally posted by deleted member

The ONLY reason ANYONE is in business is to make as much money as possible, and I'm sure that includes AANR. Morals tend to get in the way of that.

Thats very true. Since there are many variations of people who practice nudism as said by - -tom, - - IS open to all of those demographics. And since they have the majority support of "lifestyle" people,thats who they will continue to appeal to. Im sure we all understand that - - is and will remain open to swingers. My problem is: as I KEEP SAYING." Why do they disguise themselves as a FAMILY resort..when they dont NEED to? If they flat out said we are an adults only clothing optional resort. They would loose very little of their main clientel.

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