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noshame
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 Posted - 06/02/2004 : 2:14:17 PM
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I have been discussing participating in nude recreation with my wife. So far she has refused to participate. Her objections are not that others would see her nude?...but that she would see others nude. She is worried about sexual attractions. Deep down my wife has alot of shame about her body. I love her and think she is beautiful.I do not want to push her or hurt her in any way. Any thoughts or feedback from anyone would be appreciated. Thank you.
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NudeAl
Forum Member
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Posted - 06/03/2004 : 01:51:22 AM
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I think many here have been in the same boat at one time or another. I would say gentle persuasion is best don't be pushy but be persistent. think babysteps try it around the house and if you have a private backyard or garden try out there also. Show her this site and others like it whre she can see a little of what you are talking about. Then before you go to a club do your home work. Is is nude or clothing optional? Ask if they have a program or point of contact for a reluctant spouse. Some clubs offer a sort of support program for this as it is a fairly common thing. But most of all be patient, eventually most will give it a try but you are going to have to work on it together the same as most things in a relationship.
"The best dress for walking is nakedness." Collin Fletcher
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Cheri
Forum Member
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Posted - 06/03/2004 : 12:43:54 PM
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noshame, welcome to these boards.
I can recommend going to - /cheri.html
Print out that website; it's a brochure I put together for reluctant partners. Leave it where she'll see it. When you're sure she's seen it, offer a compromise. In exchange for a mere hr. of her time, offer her something she'll really like: you cooking for her, you taking her out to dinner, her choice of tv show or movie, something in your budget. It may take time for her to be comfortable, if ever. Nudism is not for everyone. One of my club couples: she took 10 yrs. to actually be nude in our hot tub.
Once she sees that it's not a sexual atmosphere, she will probably change her mind. Human nature being what it is, we all still look, but it's only looking. She can find a clothed man attractive as well as a nude man.
I wish you well.
Regards, Cheri
Doing what I can to positively promote nudism
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paul2012
New Member
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Posted - 07/26/2005 : 2:56:39 PM
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Hi I am new to nudism and my girl friend is not confortable with being nude in publice haw can I make her feel better about her body
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Edited by - paul2012 on 07/26/2005 3:48:32 PM |
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Cheri
Forum Member
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Posted - 07/26/2005 : 4:36:46 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by paul2012
Hi I am new to nudism and my girl friend is not confortable with being nude in publice haw can I make her feel better about her body
Welcome to this forum/messages boards. You might read some of the previous messages on this thread.
They are surely one place to start.
Regards, Cheri
Doing what I can to positively promote nudism
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FireProf
Forum Member
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Posted - 07/26/2005 : 6:29:58 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by paul2012
Hi I am new to nudism and my girl friend is not confortable with being nude in publice haw can I make her feel better about her body
Start at home first.............don't jump to the public nudity step so fast.
Let her become comfortable with nudity around you and herself in the privacy of your home or backyard before ever mentioning or advancing to public/social nudity.
Take nudeAl's advice..............baby steps first!
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frogman
New Member
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Posted - 08/08/2005 : 10:09:09 PM
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I began practicing nudism before I met my wife. I have never told her about it because I am worried what she might think. She is comfortable with nudity around the house, so that hurdle is cleared. I'm just unsure about exactly how to approach her about joining me at the nudist club I sometimes go to. Any suggestions?
The truth shall set you free.
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Cheri
Forum Member
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Posted - 08/09/2005 : 09:55:12 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by frogman
I began practicing nudism before I met my wife. I have never told her about it because I am worried what she might think. She is comfortable with nudity around the house, so that hurdle is cleared. I'm just unsure about exactly how to approach her about joining me at the nudist club I sometimes go to. Any suggestions?
The truth shall set you free.
How about going to www.travelites.info/cheri.html and print out my brochure that's online. Leave it where she'll see it. When you're sure she's seen it, ask about her thoughts.
I wish you well.
Cheri
Doing what I can to positively promote nudism
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frogman
New Member
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Posted - 08/10/2005 : 9:09:57 PM
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I read the pamphlet, Cheri, and thought it was great. I am still very nervous about sharing it with her. I know she has some body image issues and might be terriefied just at the thought of public nudity. Are there any ways to begin softening these feelings before I ask her about it point blank?
I'm enjoying this site immensely,
Frogman
The truth shall set you free.
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Cheri
Forum Member
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Posted - 08/10/2005 : 9:19:02 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by frogman
I read the pamphlet, Cheri, and thought it was great. I am still very nervous about sharing it with her. I know she has some body image issues and might be terriefied just at the thought of public nudity. Are there any ways to begin softening these feelings before I ask her about it point blank?
I'm enjoying this site immensely,
Frogman
Do you sleep with clothes on? Do you wear clothes at the house? Add more nude time with just the two of you, don't push it. Mention that you'd love to skinnydip, not having to sit around in a soggy, wet swimsuit. See what kind of response you get and take it from there.
Regards, Cheri
Doing what I can to positively promote nudism
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chic
Forum Member
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Posted - 08/11/2005 : 08:18:48 AM
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Similar to what Cheri suggested, is what actually happened with my wife and me.
She was reluctant to being nude, even around the house. So, besides discussions on the subject, there were two main things that helped my wife get accustmed to nudity and overcome her modesty.
1st, I always slept nude which she eventally accepted as a norm. 2nd, was getting a spa tub. Alone and using it together was like indoor skinny-dipping. After time, it led her to being nude before and after it's use.
Now my wife is very comfortable with our nudity. It just took a little time and a couple of non-threatening activities.
Chic
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Rahul7009
Forum Member
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Posted - 09/09/2005 : 01:18:53 AM
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I personally donot have any shame about me body. I also think one should not have any shame about his/her body. There are all types and sizes of bodies.
Just enjoy the feel of air on your skin and relax.
~~[({<RAHUL>})]~~
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old hippie
Forum Member
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Posted - 09/09/2005 : 9:12:40 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Rahul7009
I personally donot have any shame about me body. I also think one should not have any shame about his/her body. There are all types and sizes of bodies.
Just enjoy the feel of air on your skin and relax.
~~[({<RAHUL>})]~~
Rahul, if only it were that easy for everyone.
The point of the topic here, is developing means to help some people overcome the anxieties they have. Not that they *want* to have, but that they DO have. Some phobias are stronger than others, some are more useful than others, some are easier to lose than others. If you are scared of snakes, you look for a way to deal with the fear; but someone who isn't scared of snakes can't know what you feel, so might not be able to help.
Body shame isn't something we come upon by conscious choice; and some of the genesis of feelings is deep and convoluted. That makes it difficult to change them.
Dum vivimus, vivamus!
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Overcoming Issues About Body Shame, Etc.
