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Bikeracer
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Posted - 07/24/2004 : 02:17:43 AM
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No topic needed here, eh? Does that mean I can whine? It's too hot here after 11:00 p.m. in the pacific northwest of the U.S.! Feel's muggy and I'm sweaty...But life is good!
Nude in the pacific northwest
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calmnude
Forum Member
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Posted - 07/24/2004 : 09:32:34 AM
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It has been sticky and very humid here (plus ozone alerts) for the last week. I hate rain on the weekends lately, but this a.m. it is 68 (20C),
and has been raining for the last 6 or 7 hours. refreshing.
i will be ok until noon. then hope sun comes out with humidity down.
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nudeisntlewd
Forum Member
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 Posted - 07/24/2004 : 1:19:49 PM
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I'm sorry, I need to ramble a bit today. I'm sorry for the lengthy dissertation. I don't want to bring everyone down, but don't worry, there is a happy ending.
There's been a change of plans for me. I'm back to Minnesota. There are too many loose ends to tie up here. Too many things left undone.
I met with formidable resistance from my brothers about the idea of moving. Some of them like to control me. I'm 48, but they still think I need to be led and watched out for and have my nose and butt wiped. It's not malicious, just mis-placed concern. One of my sisters-in-law secretly told me she admired me for following my dream of living in Florida. She said,"You have to get away from this family." She is the only one who recognizes, understands and supports me. Nancy, I love you.
But to hell with them. The real reason I came back (by the way, I only made it to southern Wisconsin), was because I could not go on living without being here to watch my son grow into the fine man I know he will be. I want to take him to movies and skateboarding and watch our favorite TV shows together and help him with his homework. I suffered more anguish as I packed in the days preceeding my departure, than I have ever experienced over a death.
I was born here, lived here all my life, and I'm now convinced that I will someday die and be buried here.
My son is currently at camp, and my "wife" is a counselor there. It has been during this week as I was loading the bare essentials in my little Saturn, that I became intensely unhappy as I prepared to go. I started to miss him already because I knew from now on, I would rarely see him. I have no remorse over my decision to stay. Although I expect to have conflict with my estranged wife since she won't be so totally rid of me, I haven't been even in the slightest bit sad since I returned. The peace will be somewhat shattered when she returns from camp, sweaty, dirty and wanting a shower.
Knowing how bad I felt this week and how I feel now, I know I've made the right choice. That's the happy ending.
Randy 
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Edited by - nudeisntlewd on 07/24/2004 1:33:42 PM |
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calmnude
Forum Member
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Posted - 07/24/2004 : 4:31:41 PM
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Randy,
I know it must have been a difficult decision. yet you balanced your desire to go to Florida against the love of your son. I think you are more "grown up" than any of your siblings.
While you will probably get grief for "chickening out", you know why you stayed, it is the best of reasons, and right now the best one.
and dont give up your dreams. you never know what may happen in future.
there may be a sunny coast for you someday after all. just se what happens.
in the meantime, love and enjoy your son.
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Ned Adams
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Posted - 07/25/2004 : 12:18:26 AM
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Randy,
Sometimes things happen in our lives that open up new opportunities. Is it possible that you and your estranged wife will have the opportunity to communicate again and work together with your son? It is clear that both of you have good traits. Not always do attempts to reconcile work out. I know of some that unfortunately did not. I also know of at least two that miracuously did work out and resulted in a strong family today. Pray and do whatever you need to do so that if she is willing, you are ready. Thank you for sharing this with us and my best wishes to you.
Ned
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Country: USA
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No Topic Needed - Just Chatting - July 2004
