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steineri
Forum Member
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 Posted - 11/08/2017 : 06:43:22 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by soonbnude
Diger & Fire & others
Happy with what you have said, however I think we also need to challenge some of our nudist friends who often encircle women who come to the beach. I see this happen regularly and recently. 5 young women came to my favourite beach, they wore bikini bottoms and small dental floss g-strings (god knows why they bother, can't be comfortable but I didn't ask). The girls seemed to enjoy themselves for a couple of hours with minimal amount on but I could see they were a little wary of the guys around them. About 4 older guys, clearly regulars with great tans, parked themselves 5-10 metres from them within 15-20 minutes of the girls being there. I was about 50m up the beach and watched this occur from when the girls arrived until they left, 3 of the 4 men moved elsewhere within 5-10 minutes of the girls leaving.
Again I wondered what to do, if anything, is it my responsibility. I find the men's behaviour also to be inappropriate, too close and impinging on the girls space, this beach is enormous. In my opinion the men's behaviour is similar to the photographers behaviour except the people causing what I believe was an issue were nudists. I like seeing naked women at the beach as much as anyone but this sort of behaviour I believe will turn women away.
SBN, frustrated and disappointed.
I would just use your judgement. If it looks like the girls are uncomfortable and need assistance, tell the guys to bugger off, especially if there is a large area they can go to
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FireProf
Forum Member
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Posted - 11/08/2017 : 10:17:41 AM
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Yes, this has happened several times on both our nude beaches. Have we said something ... sure. Walking down the beach, we've encountered these guys and just said, "ya know, we try and get women to visit the beach and enjoy themselves and we complain about the creeps and pervs, but we, as regulars can also be creepy and thought to be pervy, even if we are just trying to be friendly. Your actions scared those young ladies away."
The few times either of these types of guys said anything back to my wife and I, it was always, "I was just trying to be friendly." We understood that but you can do so without sitting on top of them. Many of the nude beaches we've visited are quite large and there's plenty of space to give others the space they need to feel comfortable. I/we always ask other couples or even females if it's okay to set up near them, if there seems to be limited space when the beach fills up. They appreciate you asking.
But what to say to these regulars that can act just as the creeps and pervs you're trying to keep away? I guess just what we would say ... it seemed to work but it's truly an ongoing battle and I learned very early in my life ... "you can't fix stupid!"
Loves being naked. Plays well with others!
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Edited by - FireProf on 11/08/2017 10:20:17 AM |
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Country: USA
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Bill Bowser
Forum Member
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Posted - 11/08/2017 : 10:47:55 AM
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At risk of being pedantic I’ll reiterate, if the ladies weren’t so sensitive to being looked at this wouldn’t be a problem.
It’s curious that women, and some men, spend so much time and effort every day to make themselves more attractive, but when they remove their clothes they want to be invisible. I don’t get it.
Bill Bowser - Cincinnati
Not lewd, not crude, just nude.
Nudists are everywhere, but they're hard to identify with their clothes on.
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Country: USA
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FireProf
Forum Member
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Posted - 11/08/2017 : 3:02:16 PM
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Bill ... you know the kind of guys soonbnude is referring to. 
Some women will actually visit a nude beach and not want to be leered at or crowded and we know that even some nudist men leer at most women on the beach and will at times park themselves closer than they need to be.
We all like space between us, no matter whether we are clothed or nude.
Loves being naked. Plays well with others!
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Country: USA
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soonbnude
Forum Member
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Posted - 11/08/2017 : 3:39:09 PM
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Fire
Thanks, you are right in what you've understood me to say. There was one guy on the beach I see often, I went 30m past him when I arrived. These girls arrived 15 minutes after me and were 20-30m the other side of this guy, they chose their spot. Once they settled and stripped down to what they wore these other nudists started swarming within another 15 minutes or so.
I've said it before on the site it would be great if the feeling of the beach were such that it attracted more women and also younger women and men or made them feel comfortable to come there and comfortable to strip off. This sort of behaviour deters women in particular. My observation at the beaches I visit is that nudists at the beach are an ageing demographic, mostly men. Be nice if our attitudes and actions could encourage others to attend so that changed.
These guys maybe we can chat to or this forum may help get the message out there. Also I probably should get to know the guy I see there often, he did not bother the girls and I've never seen him do anything that others may be offended by, that way we could say something together, strength in numbers.
Cheers, SBN.
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Country: Australia
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FireProf
Forum Member
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Posted - 11/08/2017 : 7:05:15 PM
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The fact is, no matter how nice a guy you are and that your intentions are above board, the 20-30's females visiting a nude beach and either partaking completely or with little to nothing on, don't want some guy their dad's or grandfather's age trying to be friendly. They don't see it that way and we should be savvy enough to realize that and give them that space that I mentioned.
Loves being naked. Plays well with others!
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Edited by - FireProf on 11/08/2017 7:06:16 PM |
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Country: USA
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soonbnude
Forum Member
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Posted - 11/09/2017 : 1:17:05 PM
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Thanks for the advice and support. Guess I was unsure whether I was being too conservative or getting into something I should just leave alone, i.e. not my business but it is a less savoury aspect of our CO beaches . I'll try to get to know the quiet guy I often see there and mention the subject to him too. It's nice to see others at the beach, don't want it to just be a place where wrinkly naked tanned old men congregate. SBN.
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Country: Australia
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NaturistDoc
Forum Member
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Posted - 11/09/2017 : 1:47:16 PM
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One of the things I appreciated about Club Orient is that their staff would deal promptly - and in one case i witnessed, rather firmly - with people who came onto their section of Orient Beach and tried to take pictures. They didn't bother with the casual tourists who wanted to have a look at all the naked people; it's all part of the fun. But if a guest reported someone taking pictures or otherwise acting like a jerk, 2 or 3 Club O employees would quickly show them the error of their ways.
I can't quite go along with Bill B's "if the ladies weren't so sensitive" line. It seems like it's blaming the victim. By nature and/or nurture, men and women don't "see and be seen" in the same way. Think about it: Did "Playgirl" ever outsell "Playboy"? It may be sexist and patronizing of me to believe that the women brave enough to visit a nude beach are deserving of a level of collective protection from predatory behavior, but that's my story and I'm sticking to it.
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Country: USA
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Bill Bowser
Forum Member
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Posted - 11/09/2017 : 7:38:29 PM
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Like blaming the victim? Victim of what? Being looked at in a public place? Since you can’t change other peoples’ behavior, and you can change how you choose to react to it, doesn’t it make sense to ignore the harmless pests and be happy? Why choose to be upset by something that really has no tangible effect on you over which you have no control?
It would be great if everyone considered their neighbors’ feelings before they approached, but that’s never going to happen. Absent that, ignoring the pests is an effective solution. I didn’t claim it was perfect.
Bill Bowser - Cincinnati
Not lewd, not crude, just nude.
Nudists are everywhere, but they're hard to identify with their clothes on.
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Country: USA
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soonbnude
Forum Member
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Posted - 11/10/2017 : 4:22:11 PM
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Doc, I guess that shows the advantage of a resort, staff (presumably of the textile type) can step in and move on any people they see as an issue. At a public CO beach it's not the same obviously.
Bill, take your point, you can't change the behaviour of others but you can change your reaction to others behaviour (my wife says that to me). It's just bloody annoying to witness this stuff I find. Maybe I need a thicker skin or more sunscreen (just joking).
It was my first day of the beach for this season and I was annoyed by both incidents I witnessed but have seen lots over the years as you guys have. It concerns me that pressure may come to bear on these beautiful places, where we legally can wander naked on a public beach, if inappropriate behaviour (IMO) becomes the norm and is accepted by us as nudists.
Complaints have been made before here and pressure to close one CO beach was significant a few years back, police appear on some occassions. In a way I'm being selfish, I don't want that to change as I like this freedom.
SBN.
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Country: Australia
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NaturistDoc
Forum Member
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Posted - 11/10/2017 : 11:50:28 PM
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SBN, you're right about resorts having an advantage over public beaches. That is likely why the number of women going nude or topless on traditionally C/O beaches in Europe, according to numerous press reports, has sharply declined over the past decade or so.
Bill is free to urge the women to "ignore the harmless pests", but perhaps he should ask the women if they consider the pests "harmless". By his logic, I suppose members of minority communities "choose to be upset" by racial slurs screamed at them, since such behavior has "no tangible effect". Rubbish. If women feel that they don't have allies among the men, their numbers in the nudist community will continue to dwindle.
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Nature-boy1776
New Member
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Posted - 11/11/2017 : 07:00:30 AM
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Bill there is also a big difference between wanting to look "good/pretty" and wanting to attract attention/advances. People (not just women) like to look good for themselves but don't necessarily want to draw crowds.
Too many men believe looking "attractive" is an invitation. It is not!
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Bill Bowser
Forum Member
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Posted - 11/13/2017 : 12:03:09 PM
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Hmm, I don’t understand how someone can confuse a voyeur sneaking a peek at a naked woman on a beach with a provocateur instigating violence by screaming in someone’s face, but there’s a lot of things I don’t understand. There is one thing that I understand quite well. As a small child I learned that sticks and stones may break your bones, but words will never hurt you. The obvious truth in this is often overlooked.
One can pontificate about how some men, who will never read his words, should behave, or he could agree that not getting upset and accepting reality is a better approach.
Bill Bowser - Cincinnati
Not lewd, not crude, just nude.
Nudists are everywhere, but they're hard to identify with their clothes on.
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Country: USA
| Posts: 345 |
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NaturistDoc
Forum Member
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Posted - 11/13/2017 : 12:35:29 PM
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"Not getting upset and accepting reality is a better approach"? Really? That's your philosophy? I suppose it must be comforting, but it guarantees that nothing will ever change. We'll have to agree to disagree on that.
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Country: USA
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Bill Bowser
Forum Member
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Posted - 11/13/2017 : 1:17:35 PM
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Yeah, you have to accept what you can’t change.
Bill Bowser - Cincinnati
Not lewd, not crude, just nude.
Nudists are everywhere, but they're hard to identify with their clothes on.
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Country: USA
| Posts: 345 |
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Textile taking photo's at a CO beach
