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b123igt
New Member
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 Posted - 08/11/2007 : 12:05:31 PM
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I am a new memeber and new to this forum.I am a 59 y/o married male. I enjoy being nude at home and sleep nude. I recently told my wife that I wanted to try social nudism. I contact a small, new, only open week-end club. The owner offered to give us a clothed tour during the week when no one was there but him. She said absolutely not. She also said it is gross and disgusting. I am in central North Carolina and as all know, a "single" male is note very welcome. I really feel that my wanting to experience social nudism is now cut off because of this. Any suggestions or help.
Notice: This moderator, operating under username 'Moderator', has been terminated for repeatedly censoring or altering posts without providing a clear indication of which policy was being enforced. Her actions were not sanctioned by this organization.
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Edited by - Moderator on 08/11/2007 6:53:41 PM
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Country: USA
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Cheri
Forum Member
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Posted - 08/11/2007 : 7:06:02 PM
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Bar-S is where I believe you've attempted to visit. Has the owner offered for you to meet with him and his wife elsewhere than on-grounds?
BTW,You are not a single male. You are a man whose wife states she won't accompany him. That makes you a married single. Does she realize just what nudism/naturism is? Have you offered her a compromise? Have you printed out my brochure for reluctant partners and can be found online at - /cheri.html ? Print it out and leave it where she'll see it. Just don't hand it to her. After you're sure she's seen it, offer a compromise. In exchange for her accompanying you, offer her something she'd really like, ie. you cooking for her, a dinner out, her choice of tv show or movie, something in your budget.
I can offer 3 other suggestions: be patient, be patient, be patient. PLUS keep reminding her of how lovely she is. Nudism isn't for everyone. The idea of nudism can take a number of years for her to get used to. You have to judge what's more important: you visiting a nudist park or your marriage.
Cheri
Doing what I can to positively promote nudism
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CMx2
Forum Member
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Posted - 08/12/2007 : 2:53:45 PM
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I think that brochure is a good start. I think education is the main key to acceptance. I actually showed it to my wife a few years ago myself.
Many believe that nudists are either all hippies or all swingers. If you can get past these stereotypes, you'll have made a huge amount of progress.
I would also re-iterate Cheri's statement above about patience. If you press the issue, you're likely to come up against a impassable wall.
Instead, I encourage you to do as much research as you can and discuss it with her once in a while.
At the very least, if you can get her out of the "gross and disgusting" mindset, she may not be so appalled if you want to visit a club by yourself sometime.
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b123igt
New Member
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Posted - 08/12/2007 : 8:35:47 PM
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I know it is going to be an uphill climb, but I guess anything good is worth waiting on. I am really going to have to work on the "gross and disgusting" mindset as she is very closed mind on many things. lol, huh?
Thanks for you reply Cheri. I did download and print the brochure. Also, thanks to CMx2.
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Country: USA
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b123igt
New Member
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Posted - 08/12/2007 : 8:44:17 PM
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Cheri, it was Misty Hole Point, not the Bar-S
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mugwert
Forum Member
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Posted - 08/12/2007 : 11:21:14 PM
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B123igt
I tried the be patient, patient and even more patient. My wife can't get past the nude=sex. She refuses to go to any type of resort with me, even if I tell that she can stay dressed. So I am stuck going alone, fortunately there is a resort not too far away that allows me to go and enjoy the naturalist lifestyle. Hang in there hope you have more luck than I did.
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NTLnTAA
Forum Member
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Posted - 08/13/2007 : 08:39:01 AM
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My wife and I have a female friend. She had suspicions about what we do on the weekends. She is comfortable enough with us to be able to ask us if we are nudists. She is carring a few extra pounds. She said she could never do that because of here size. I started saving the ANNR bulletins to give to her the next time we saw her. Then the time after that, that we got togeather, she commented on how the women in the bulletin looked. I could see the wheels turning. Haven't crossed paths with her since that.
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jim19452
Forum Member
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Posted - 08/13/2007 : 4:12:00 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by b123igt
I am a new memeber and new to this forum.I am a 59 y/o married male. I enjoy being nude at home and sleep nude. I recently told my wife that I wanted to try social nudism. I contact a small, new, only open week-end club. The owner offered to give us a clothed tour during the week when no one was there but him. She said absolutely not. She also said it is gross and disgusting. I am in central North Carolina and as all know, a "single" male is note very welcome. I really feel that my wanting to experience social nudism is now cut off because of this. Any suggestions or help.
I too live in central NC. The BarS (www.bar-s-ranch.com, north of Greensboro) held a Clothing Optional (CO) 5K Walk or Run Race the last Saturday in July, CO Triathlon two Saturdays later and will do so again next year. (This year I did not finish next to last in the 5K, I finished 149th!!) They are trying to organize some CO mountain bike races in September or October.
They have CO Open House visits, last one in September, I think.
My wife initially thought my going to a nudist camp "disgusting." On returning from my visits I began explaining what I did, etc. and she has become somewhat interested and encourages me to go.
Best Wishes, Jim
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Edited by - jim19452 on 08/13/2007 4:15:36 PM |
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Country: USA
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Bamanate
Forum Member
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Posted - 08/13/2007 : 7:42:15 PM
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I'm also a new member and I'm in the same boat. My wife did go with me to a nude beach once, Apollo Beach in Florida. She has since declined going back. But without being pushy I'm not giving up or even bringing the matter up for now. I have however started being nude most of the time in the house hoping she'll join me. Wish me luck.........and good luck to you.
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hikenude
New Member
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Posted - 08/13/2007 : 10:07:27 PM
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My girlfriend was against it too for a while, then I got her to try it, she said for the first 10 minutes she was really scared, but then she started to relax and enjoy it. I told her that every time she went nude with me, I would do something for her. Now I get to vacume the house every time she is nude in the wild with me
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jeanluc
Forum Member
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Posted - 08/13/2007 : 11:13:54 PM
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I have just recently (within the last several weeks) decided that despite what my wife says about me being nude outside of the shower and dressing, that I was going to do it whenever I was alone. Well, she came home at lunch today and when she saw me, she had the most disgusted look I could imagine so I got dressed. She wondered "why" and what I got out of it. When I told her all the reasons, it didn't seem to matter. She blasted me for getting our 2 1/2 year old grandson out of bed in the nude. She complained that I shouldn't have been nude while eating breakfast with her and him even though I told her I had been excercising and wanted to cool off before showering and starting the day.
I am not sure if it is worth it, so I have decided I will be nude when she is not here and quickly get dressed when I hear her come in the door. What else can I do? I have already given her numerous articles and though she reads them, she doesn't believe what they say. I have tried to get her to go nude when it is just us two, but she totally refuses. Unfortunately there are not any clubs near that I could try to get her to see what it is like, so I will just have to live like this.
Thanks for letting me vent my frustrations.
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Country: USA
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mugwert
Forum Member
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Posted - 08/14/2007 : 09:33:24 AM
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Jeanluc
I have come to the conclusion that one of the reasons that its easier for men to be nude socially is because of the locker room. From a very early age, men are nude together in the shower and learn to think nothing of it. Even today, the health club I belong to has a large tiled room with 10 or 12 shower heads along the wall for the men to shower in, the women get individual multi partitioned stalls so that they never have to see each other undressed. Underlying message, men need much less privacy than women and women learn not to be naked in public.
just a thought, I'm sure there will be those who disagree though
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Pete Knight
Forum Member
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Posted - 08/14/2007 : 1:46:43 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by mugwert
Jeanluc
I have come to the conclusion that one of the reasons that its easier for men to be nude socially is because of the locker room. From a very early age, men are nude together in the shower and learn to think nothing of it. Even today, the health club I belong to has a large tiled room with 10 or 12 shower heads along the wall for the men to shower in, the women get individual multi partitioned stalls so that they never have to see each other undressed. Underlying message, men need much less privacy than women and women learn not to be naked in public.
just a thought, I'm sure there will be those who disagree though
Yes you're right, there is someone who disagrees!
All the schools I went to had the same changing room arrangements for girls as boys, as did the municipal swimming pool I worked on many years ago, and although I haven't been in a girls changing room in recent years I'm willing to put money on the facilities still being the same for both genders, but that's in the UK not the land of the prudes!!
Pete Knight
I forgot to mention the mixed changing facilities over here, there is only the one changing room, but it has multi partitioned stalls for use by either gender, and there are family stalls too!
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Edited by - Pete Knight on 08/14/2007 1:49:31 PM |
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Country: United Kingdom
| Posts: 297 |
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jim19452
Forum Member
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Posted - 08/14/2007 : 4:04:13 PM
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Pete, I prefer the Carolina's clothes changing facilities. The great outdoors! Park car, get out, undress, put clothes in car. Saves money. Strikes me as less traumatic than using formal facilities. And, consider the carbon offset advantage of not constructing!
Best Wishes, Jim
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Country: USA
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Pete Knight
Forum Member
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Posted - 08/15/2007 : 08:48:56 AM
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Jim
You're right, and I do use the great outdoors in the summer, but unfortunately our summers are a little too short, so I continue my naturist lifestyle indoors, we have a great event lined up for November, a repeat of last years successful event where we are naked from Friday evening through to Sunday midday with all the hotel and water park facilities available to us.
Details here! http://www.british-naturism.org.uk/pages/pages.asp?page_ID=316
Pete Knight
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Country: United Kingdom
| Posts: 297 |
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b123igt
New Member
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Posted - 08/15/2007 : 2:26:17 PM
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jim19452, contacted Bar-S and was informed I was welcome. Thanks. Start new job on Monday, but will try Bar-S ASAP. This will be my first time with social nudism. I am sure I will receive it when I get there. Hope to see you there. Still a long way to go with my wife. Maybe someday.
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