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madfan
New Member
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Posted - 03/25/2008 : 03:33:27 AM
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As a married couple in our mid-40s, I'm not really sure how my acceptance of nudism came about. After about 2 years of self-reflection, I feel it is something I always had the desire to do, but based on 'normal' life and how I was raised, never thought it was something acceptable to do. Now I've come to embrace the idea, enjoying times at home when I am alone to be naked. One thing I haven't seen mentioned(at least in this thread), is that my wife's main objection to public nudism is based in her religious beliefs. This concern is two fold. First is her own belief that it is not acceptable, which as has been stated, will require patience for her to change what she believes about nudism. The second concern, while it may seem trivial to others, is the dreaded 'what would other people think' if they found out about it. I am concerned that this is the hurdle she will never be able to overcome, even as a reason for her not wanting me to get involved in social nudism. As someone else stated above, I have accepted that at least for now, my nudism activities will be confined to when I am home alone. There is a resort in our area I visited alone, and they were friendly and welcoming, but my wife is not aware I went.
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Tuffers
Forum Member
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Posted - 03/25/2008 : 04:19:10 AM
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Thanks for your input Madfan. You didn't expand on what your wife bases position on relating to her religious beliefs or what religion she follows. I'm not aware of anywhere in the holy scripts that is anti nudity.
Her other concern is as you say, trivial. Every one of us has the right in a free society to live their life as they see fit. We are quite open about our life of nudism and we have no guit as there is nothing to be guilty about. Going off to a resort by yourself and not letting your wife know is a rescipe for disaster in my opinion. Be open and she may even join you.
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catbird
Forum Member
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 Posted - 03/25/2008 : 2:43:01 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by madfan
One thing I haven't seen mentioned(at least in this thread), is that my wife's main objection to public nudism is based in her religious beliefs.
Quoting the Bible in regards to nudity has the potential to start a lengthy discussion.
In Leviticus The King James version says, "Thou shalt not uncover the nakedness of"" -- various family members. The modern translations say that you shall not have intercourse with those family members.
Matthew speaks of clothe the naked. That means to donate clothing to such as The Salvation Army.
A healing in Luke tells of a man who was naked and lived in a cemetery (of all places). Then a herd of pigs ran into the lake and drowned. Then the man became clothed.
In Timothy, Paul said that a woman shall dress modestly. I read one commentary that said that means that she ought not wear extravagantly expensive clothes and fancy jewelry.
Now I am getting off the topic of The Bible. At the nude beach I once met a woman who was wearing a cross pendant hanging from her neck and otherwise totally nude. I commented that it interests me that she is wearing a cross at a nude beach. She mentioned at which church she worships. The church is one of the biggest Fundamentalist churches in this area. She also mentioned that when with parishioners she dare not mention her nudism. Somehow she felt relaxed about nudism; although member of that conservative church.
Naturally, Catbird
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madfan
New Member
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Posted - 03/26/2008 : 02:12:21 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by Tuffers
Thanks for your input Madfan. You didn't expand on what your wife bases position on relating to her religious beliefs or what religion she follows. I'm not aware of anywhere in the holy scripts that is anti nudity.
Her other concern is as you say, trivial. Every one of us has the right in a free society to live their life as they see fit. We are quite open about our life of nudism and we have no guit as there is nothing to be guilty about. Going off to a resort by yourself and not letting your wife know is a rescipe for disaster in my opinion. Be open and she may even join you.
I agree with you about not finding scriptures that are anti-nudity. In fact, I have read many scripture passages in an interesting and fresh new light after coming to terms with my own acceptance of nudism. However, as protestant christians, the 'accepted' position is opposed to public displays of nudity. It is how she was raised and after 40+ years of believing one way... to embrace nudism would go against her set of values. Which does lead to the second issue. It is a big step from being free to live how I want, and dealing with the consequences of going against what others believe to be 'proper' and 'acceptable'. I saw last night a resort is holding a nude 5k run this summer. As I recently have begun running again, I tossed around in my head today if this would be the opportunity to discuss my interest with my wife... explaining my desire to try running nude...
Thanks for letting me share :)
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jim19452
Forum Member
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Posted - 03/26/2008 : 08:00:00 AM
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madfan,
The Clothing Optional 5K Run or Walk races are fun. I have participated the last two years along with 149 and 161 others. Afterwards award ceremonies were held and then nude and clothed photos taken. There were about 35 or 40 females in the races.
Almost all participated naked and a good time was had by all.
Best Wishes, Jim
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Edited by - jim19452 on 03/26/2008 08:00:59 AM |
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coveresid
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Posted - 03/27/2008 : 02:33:44 AM
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Had some nice nude time this past weekend. We were in 75 degree weather and at the condo. We took some time on Saturday to relax and get some sun before going to play golf. I went nude, my wife had on her bikini. On Sunday we took some more time to enjoy the sun. This time DW didn't bother with the bikini, but just stripped off her clothes and went outside nude. I wasn't very far behind her in joining her outside nude. The nice warm sun felt great and the chance to be nude with the wife was special. She won't join me all the time, but has become more relaxed at spending nude time together.
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Tuffers
Forum Member
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Posted - 03/27/2008 : 06:24:46 AM
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You lucky people coveresid. On sunday it was snowing here in the South East of the UK. Mind you I was nude whilst decorating( painting) the inside of the house
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The Natural One
Forum Member
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Posted - 09/29/2008 : 01:17:15 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by illusion
Okay after what 18 yrs of marriage my wife still is hot and cold concerning this. Somedays she is okay lets go. Other days its not on your life. It is funny though some times she will go naked around the house, or sleep nude. Other times she can't wait to get dressed. I think herself image is what is stopping her. But to me she is a knock out. She questioned me once about going on my own. I told her I would rather go with her. Not sure that is any help however. Because I am still waiting. No I do not push it. That just makes her mad and she moves to no way. Still I guess I can always hope she changes her mind.
Hi,
I love being nude but my wife does not understand it. She used to lay out nude with my daughters, but now does not even sleep nude. Times are changing. She now gives me a hard time when I am nude, and I pretty much have something on (boxers or a robe) tell she goes to bed, then they come off. I wish I could get her to loosen up a bit. I have not been to a nude beach etc. but would love to someday. Part of my family knows about my of Naturalism but not all. It looks like it is pretty much public information now. I write music and some of my songs have been about this subject. ( I would love to share my thoughts with the world but can hardly even tell anyone about my interests.) Laws in this country are pretty restrictive about nudity and it seems like a guy my age is just considered a pervert for wanting to be clothes free. My wife says" I don't get it" a lot. But this time I don't get it. I love to lay nude in the sun now and she says I am a hypocrite because I used to tell her it would be bad for her ( No sunscreen.) Well I should have kept my mouth shut because she will not lay out with me at all now. ( Her looks and weight have changed over the years and I think she may be having a hard time with that.) I try not to go there if you know what I am saying. Life is tough and full of stress and being without clothes helps me.
The Natural One
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Diger
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Posted - 09/29/2008 : 09:13:33 AM
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Natural One,
How long ago was it when your wife would go nude with your kids, and how old were the kids at the time? When did she stop, was it when the kids hit puberty? That can be a hard time for the kids and she could have picked up on their discomfort. How old are she and the kids now?
Sounds like a lot of questions but the more info you can give the better the advice will be.
I know when our boys hit puberty my wife started getting uncomfortable being nude with them. We discussed how we had always taught them that family nudity was natural, and if she changed her habits now it would give them mixed signals. Now things are back to normal and she is undressed quicker than me when we get home. LOL
Sorry for rambling, just something that happened to us, it may not apply to you. Give us all the info you can think of and someone may have had the same to happen to them.
BTW ... Welcome to the board.
Diger
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Edited by - Diger on 09/29/2008 09:40:03 AM |
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Bill Bowser
Forum Member
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Posted - 09/29/2008 : 2:49:37 PM
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Ever since I "came out of the closet" and discovered how enjoyable it was for me to participate in social nudism I've given quite a bit of thought to the subject. Ive had conversations about it with naturists and textiles, and it seems to me that everyone either prefers to be nude or refuses to be seen in any public environment sans clothing. There is little or no middle ground. The textiles don't attribute their position to any logical reasons, but many opinions have no logical foundation.
Trying to change someone's opinion is often an impossible task. I have no idea why some folks love to be nude while the others are unable to bring themselves to even try it, but if the textiles can't even explain the reasons why they feel the way they do how can you expect to convince them otherwise?
A person with a closed mind is unlikely to be persuaded otherwise. Continued attempts will only be an ongoing annoyance.
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The Natural One
Forum Member
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Posted - 09/30/2008 : 01:41:27 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by Diger
Natural One,
How long ago was it when your wife would go nude with your kids, and how old were the kids at the time? When did she stop, was it when the kids hit puberty? That can be a hard time for the kids and she could have picked up on their discomfort. How old are she and the kids now?
Sounds like a lot of questions but the more info you can give the better the advice will be.
I know when our boys hit puberty my wife started getting uncomfortable being nude with them. We discussed how we had always taught them that family nudity was natural, and if she changed her habits now it would give them mixed signals. Now things are back to normal and she is undressed quicker than me when we get home. LOL
Sorry for rambling, just something that happened to us, it may not apply to you. Give us all the info you can think of and someone may have had the same to happen to them.
BTW ... Welcome to the board.
Diger
Hello Digger,
I guess it has been about 10 years or so now, since I saw my wife lay out nude. My daughters were in their late teens I would say. We are now in our mid 50's and time is flying by. Wish I could be 18 again. I remember when we were first married and streaking was the big thing. Or big idea. I would love to have done it but guess I never had the nerve. And I did not know anyone else that did it. I was intrigued by the of the baby boomer freedom seekers and music etc. of that time. I now have a grade school granddaughter who says yuck when she found out I tan without any clothes. I don't know if mom told her she used to do it like that with my wife. My mind is not as warped as some may think, or did I fall into the drink? My life is far from perfect, but I am glad to have the chance to live it, sometimes without clothes. Am I wrong for that?  The Natural One
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Diger
Forum Member
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Posted - 09/30/2008 : 10:17:38 AM
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Natural One,
Sounds like the freedom of nudity may have been passed on to your daughters inspite of your wife's change of attitude. For your grandaughter to know about your habits, someone must have been talking to her. I would find the time to talk to your daughters to get some idea of their attitude. They could be home nudies and not want their mom to know because of her attitude now. They could even have some clue to what changed their mom's attitude about home nudity.
That's a tough one .... Good Luck.
Diger
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CathyK
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Posted - 10/01/2008 : 11:02:57 AM
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I agree with Bare Bill. A person's attitude about how they see their body, their views on nudity Vs sexuality, how they think others perceive them, and their own moral attitudes are very difficult if not impossible to change after a certain age, which is typically after puberty. I have personally intervened with many men and women whose spouse or significant other objected to the other party's desire to join this lifestyle. Most of the time it is the man who wants to join and the women who objects, but there were a few the other way around. In most cases, in order for the person who objects to "come around", he or she must have a certain mindset or it will rarely happen. They must be open minded, feel that they are not being pressured or coerced, no threat of retaliation (such as "if you don't do this I will do it without you"), be in a very stable relationship (weak marriages for example make for a difficult time), and have had some experience with being nude in the past (like skinny dipping in college, or sleeping in the nude at some point in their life).
Some people are simply impossible to attract or convert to this lifestyle and the sooner you realize this and stop trying, the better your relationship will be with them.
Cathy
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NudeAl
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Posted - 10/01/2008 : 8:48:23 PM
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My wife has had a hard time with this. I would add though that she has no problem being nude around the house and is nude at home most of the time as it is easier for her she has a disability. However she has some self esteem issues with her own body. She is over weight and has gained weight since becoming disabled. She is reluctant to go to resorts with me but has no trouble being nude in our own private backyard. Consequently we spend most of our nude time in the house and our backyard with a few trips a year to the nearby nudist club. I am fine with this. I value her being with me more than I feel the need to be nude with others. I would like more but wouldn't we all. Life is about compromises and we have found a compromise that seems to work for us. Good luck to everyone else in this situation. I think if you just keep the lines of communication open and really listen to the other persons thoughts and fears you will be able to find some middle ground.
The woods are lovely, dark and deep, But I have promises to keep, And miles to go before I sleep, And miles to go before I sleep. -- Robert Frost
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capecodjack
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Posted - 10/01/2008 : 9:34:26 PM
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I have been a closet naturist for over 30 years. I took the bull by the horns and in Aug went to an open house at a local club. I felt so invigorated by my day that I will pursue any and all opportunities to continue to enjoy a clothes free environment. My wife was distressed, disgusted and sad that I would do this without her. My reszponse was something I heard when I was younger. Don't knock it if you haven't tried it. She has agreed to accompany once and I hope that she will realize the feeling of freedom being without clothes. It really invigorates you. I will be four score in 6/09 and I regret the years thjat might have been. Never too late to enjoy.
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