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Stars Upon Thars
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 Posted - 08/06/2005 : 05:11:47 AM
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Please excuse me for having not read this entire topic... I've read the first several pages but they were quite long and took me a long time to read, so I didn't really think I could stomach another 10 before I made a comment. I just want to ask a simple question, and I hope that someone can answer it. I am a male who has been interested in nude recreation for some time, but I have never really been able to try it. Obviously like other men I worry about the erection thing - it is an obstacle to my trying nudism. I had hoped to find some comfort here among other nudists, but unfortunately reading the discussions on this board has done nothing but increase my concerns.
I do not wish to go to a nude beach or resort for sexual reasons. I have a girlfriend to whom I am faithful and we are very happy. While I admit there is a certain thrill to it, there is also a certain oneness with nature (if you happen to be outside) and just a general carefree feeling that I presume most nudists attest to. I would be naked at home if I could, but my family and friends do not share my views on the subject, and I live in a suburban area where I could get in trouble for undressing.
Back to the carefree thing, though... how can a man go and relax if he knows he has to worry about covering any erection that comes along? Because they will come along. Everyone so far has at least been able to agree on that much. It's one thing to cover with a towel if you happen to be sitting around, but if you're doing some type of activity, like for instance playing volleyball, what then? If I'm just trying to play a game and the natural movement and sensations sets me off, should I leave the game and go find a towel? Or will people understand and let me keep playing until it goes away? Because here's the issue. If I'm worried about erections I will get them more often. If I know that when I get one it will go away and people won't care, that will diminish the frequency with which they occur. I know my mind and body well enough to assert that this is true. I don't want to go walking around with erections. I'd prefer to shut them off, and I'm not self conscious about my size. I don't care if people think I'm small. I would do it if I could, but as every man knows, it can't really be done. Not entirely. We all know body acceptance is part of what nudism is about. Yet it sounds like some people are saying we accept your penis as long as it's flaccid, but if it stands up you're no longer accepted.
I think what I would need is a chance to get erections and lose them without scorn. Once I found that it didn't matter, I wouldn't be self conscious about them and by not thinking about it they would become much more rare. Is that something that I can actually expect if I visit a nude beach or resort? Or am I fooling myself to believe that nudists are so accomodating? Are there some places that you know of that are more open minded about it than others?
I guess it wasn't a simple question after all, but you now have the basis of my concern. I wonder if anyone can address it to my satisfaction.
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curious1
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Posted - 08/06/2005 : 06:06:19 AM
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Stars,
I can't say this from the point of an experienced nudist, but I had the same concerns as you. I thought when I got to the resort, I would be hiding myself a lot. I was especially concerned because there were a couple of very attractive ladies there. My concern was for naught. I didn't even feel the slightest hint of an erection.
I also have a committed relationship, but I don't feel as if I am doing anything against that relationship. I am not approaching anyone for a rendezvous, and not looking with lust in my heart. I am there for myself, because it feels good. It is really no different than if I were by the pool or at a clubhouse clothed, other than I feel more comfy, and so do the others sharing the place.
As to being sexually charged, it is no more so than if the women were in bikinis. Maybe less so- bikinis are designed to be provocative. The atmosphere at a family resort is not at all sexual in nature.
Do you avoid films where there are nude women?
Perhaps you would wish to consider giving it a shor try to see if it works for you. Have you discussed this with your lady?
Stars, I am someone who loves nude women. If I see one in a movie, see one pop up on a webpage, I feel that little stirring- it's pretty easy. Please, believe me, it is less likely to happen than you suspect.
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Edited by - curious1 on 08/06/2005 06:07:51 AM |
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Gary94
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Posted - 08/26/2005 : 6:28:38 PM
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Stars I know just how you feel. That was my concern my first times. The only way to get over it is simply do it. The more times you are in a social nude climate the less fear you will have. The first 20 minutes will be the test. After you are used to being nude on your first visit you won't have to worry. If you are like I was you can always wear a beach towel over your shoulder. You'd be surprised how much it covers. If it happens to pop up usually no one will notice or care. It's not so much as having an erection but what you do with it. It also depends on the type of people there. Most understand the problem with a new comer and will cut you a lot of slack. Nobody will go screaming into the night nor is there an erection police ready to nab you. Besides, if it happens it will go down shortly. The more you are nude and get used to it the less likely it will happen. And if it does? who cares.
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rendered
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Posted - 09/06/2005 : 04:47:05 AM
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A little word on this subject, from experience:
Attitudes on erections in public are NOT standardized. Different areas/resorts/locales have different spoken and unspoken opinions on the subject. You can go to a resort in the northwest where the Boner Police will hurl you out on your naked butt for daring to sport one in public (usually very uptight men trying to impress very uptight women), but you could also find yourself on a nude beach in Europe where people could care less. Some are even flattered by the sight. it's a pretty outward expression of what is sometimes a natural, spontaneous event, and sometimes a reaction to something (or someone) attractive to the person with the erection.
Anyone who tells you that it simply "doesn't happen" is deluding themselves. Perhaps it doesn't happen to them, but that's usually a sign of some ugly repression going on within, or perhaps they had themselves berated out of existence at one point for allowing it to occur.
At a relatively recent trip to a resort in the Northwest (you wouldn't believe how challenging it is to visit these places as a single male, but it can be done. I wanted to be left alone to read in the sun.) I saw a family ejected from the park because their seven year old boy was not 'properly covered with you know what'. No, i didn't intervene. I left. Not the place for me.
It's an irrelevant debate because people's opinons are what they are and absolutely will NOT be changed by discussion, debate, reason, compromise, etc. Stick to like-minded individuals. Just remember, the worst that can happen is you are asked to leave. Big deal. You mark that place off your list and go somewhere else not so obsessed with hypocrisy.
The whole reason it happens 'less often than you expect' is you DO get used to it after awhile. You get used to the wonderful comfort of being clotheless. people will advise you to use all kinds of ridiculous tactics to deal with it (towels, pools, blah blah). If you want a guaranteed tactic that WILL work, wait till the first time you see a blatantly obese 70+ year old couple walking by. Guaranteed erection killer, trust me. Keep that vision in your head and you'll be fine :).
Some people will make a huge ordeal out of it, some people won't care, and some people will be rather complemented by it. experience will show you who is who pretty quickly. The best rule is never engage in an argument with someone giving you a hard time (pardon the pun). All you have to do is say "excuse me", pull on your clothes, and walk out. Makes a stronger statement than any argument can. Any person willing to wander over and lecture you about your erection has more problems than you want to deal with.
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old hippie
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Posted - 09/07/2005 : 10:46:24 PM
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Over and again, it needs to be said: there is more to be gained from tolerance and understanding than from the imposition of rule. I would not expect to catch any grief from the existence of a temporary erection, so long as no extra attention is brought to it, and no advances nor intent is associated with the event. Any outfit that gets upset by that momentary physiology would not get my return business.
Conversely, an individual who deliberately or persistently presented his arousal to others at the beach or resort, should be shown the exit; his business is not needed.
And the notion that a family should be exiled for the (presumably innocent) condition of a seven-year old child is bordering on ridiculous, unless there are other facts not mentioned in Render's account.
Dum vivimus, vivamus!
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carbonzee
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Posted - 11/25/2005 : 10:05:05 PM
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Sorry but I think you are all crazy and that all of you supporting nudism are a disgrace on humanity itself. There's a reason all religions refuse nudism, and it doesn't take that much brains to know that God gifted us by creating us different from animals, so we shouldn't go and try to be ones! I know this post will probably be deleted, instead of sharing your thoughts back.
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old hippie
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Posted - 11/26/2005 : 09:04:16 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by carbonzee
Sorry but I think you are all crazy and that all of you supporting nudism are a disgrace on humanity itself. There's a reason all religions refuse nudism, and it doesn't take that much brains to know that God gifted us by creating us different from animals, so we shouldn't go and try to be ones! I know this post will probably be deleted, instead of sharing your thoughts back.
---Well, Carbon, it would seem you haven't read much of this forum, or you would have found that there are plenty of posts still on the site from individuals who (for whatever obscure reason) chose to visit a forum for and by naturists and to post a message opposing that practice.
. Second, you might be surprised to find that not all religions "refuse nudism". As you might read elsewhere on this site, no less a Christian personage than the Pope himself has written that nudity in itself is not sinful. The local rabbi has informed me that Judaism has no prohibition to nudity. I have not studied the Koran, so I will await your instruction on the passage which prohibits nudity for those who practice Islam. And that's just the "big three"--Hindu, sufi, Buddhist, Taoist, Rastafarianism, etc - do you have information on what particular aspect of these practices is opposed to social nudism? I won't claim that there isn't a preacher out there who opposes social nudity; but that is a far cry from the claim that, " all religions refuse nudism". One case does not prove a generality.
. Next, I am curious about your statement that we are not animals so why should we act like them? We are indeed animals, not plant or mineral. Granted, the human animal is measurably different from other animals in many ways. Without approaching the notion of soul, which is a matter of theology and too important to be left to amateurs, humans have plenty of capabilities that other animals do not. One of these is the wonderful capability to manipulate our surroundings so that we can be comfortable withoout the need for "second skins". The fact that I can sit on a beach and swim in the ocean without needing clothes is a celebration of my humanity, not a negation of it.
----The folks who have been steady contributors to this forum are NOT at all averse to a good discussion (trust me on this one!), but will require that both side use factual discourse without resorting to unsubstantiated claims or statements.
. So, let the discussion begin.
that obstreperous Old Hippie
Dum vivimus, vivamus!
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Cheri
Forum Member
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Posted - 11/26/2005 : 09:19:32 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by carbonzee
Sorry but I think you are all crazy and that all of you supporting nudism are a disgrace on humanity itself. There's a reason all religions refuse nudism, and it doesn't take that much brains to know that God gifted us by creating us different from animals, so we shouldn't go and try to be ones! I know this post will probably be deleted, instead of sharing your thoughts back.
As Old Hippie stated,and I'll repeat...I know of no religion that outright bans nudity/nudism/naturism. Under Resources at www.naturistsociety.com, you'll see a paper aka treatise, that gives 205 reasons in support of naturism including Christian support. My rabbi accepts my lifestyle. I am active in our congregation, a member of the board of directors there and on our Sisterhood.
Yes, G_d created us to rule over the animals. Nudists are above the animals. We're respectful of ourselves and others. We accpet others and ourselves for who we are and not what we look like, own, or wear. Adam and Eve were naked in the Garden; only after they were cast out did they put on clothes.
We do not delete notes here because they contradict what we very much believe. We do try to keep discussions in line with the topic. To that end, let's move this conversation where it belongs.
I do have one question for you. If you are against our family-friendly, g-rated lifestyle, why did you sign up here?
Cheri
Doing what I can to positively promote nudism
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bornnude
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Posted - 11/26/2005 : 09:38:30 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by carbonzee
Sorry but I think you are all crazy and that all of you supporting nudism are a disgrace on humanity itself. There's a reason all religions refuse nudism, and it doesn't take that much brains to know that God gifted us by creating us different from animals, so we shouldn't go and try to be ones! I know this post will probably be deleted, instead of sharing your thoughts back.
In my experience, the moderators don't remove dissenting opinions... Welcome!
Not all religions reject nudism, some are pretty passive about it in fact. Christianity, in the modern culture does dismiss nudism as abnormal but the Bible itself does not speak to it. There are lots of sites around the Internet that discuss the Bible and Nudity. These include:
Fig Leaf Forum: http://www.figleafforum.com
Boyd Allen's Site: http://www.geocities.com/boydallen/
The Bible Society and Nudity: http://my.execpc.com/~jrockel/sbs/bsn/bsn4th.html
Experience Grace: http://www.experiencegrace.com/
There are many others but those are a couple of really good sources. You will find here as well as those sites, there are people from all beliefs and professions that enjoy clothes free recreation.
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GeeWilly
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Posted - 11/28/2005 : 3:31:52 PM
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Carbonzee, I think I speak for many in expressing our disappointment that you should feel as you apparently do with regard to nudism. Please take the time to peruse the websites noted by bornnude particularly the debate on the fig leaf forum dealing with the Bible and nudity. Then return and elaborate on your brief statements.
Frankly, I am more concerned that Cheri would use the term(?) "G-d" in her response. The underlying cause for such may have more relevance than the psychological trauma carbonzee may have experienced that produced her dogmatic comment. Maybe Carbonzee has good reason to believe her points would be "edited?"
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old hippie
Forum Member
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Posted - 11/28/2005 : 5:10:22 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by carbonzee
Sorry but I think you are all crazy and that all of you supporting nudism are a disgrace on humanity itself. There's a reason all religions refuse nudism, and it doesn't take that much brains to know that God gifted us by creating us different from animals, so we shouldn't go and try to be ones! I know this post will probably be deleted, instead of sharing your thoughts back.
``There is a discussion thread under the "Society and Culture" forum dedicated to Nudism and Religion. If CarbonZee would like to explore this discussion for a few hundred KB, that might be the appropriate location.
--It is interesting to explore the interface of two such significant aspects of human behavior (and I'm not even a sociologist!).
~~~See you there!
O.H.
Dum vivimus, vivamus!
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Cheri
Forum Member
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Posted - 11/28/2005 : 8:06:07 PM
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Alert - this is an off topic message, I apologize.
quote:
Originally posted by GeeWilly
(snip)
Frankly, I am more concerned that Cheri would use the term(?) "G-d" in her response. The underlying cause for such may have more relevance than the psychological trauma carbonzee may have experienced that produced her dogmatic comment. Maybe Carbonzee has good reason to believe her points would be "edited?"
Willy, Those of us who are religious Jews tend not to write out the name of our creator.
Hugs, Cheri
Doing what I can to positively promote nudism
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Kilbassa
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Posted - 12/09/2005 : 07:20:57 AM
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Yes, the famous erection issue. Although i have never experienced this in a nudist surrounding before, the :urge" has began to flow. I simply walked away and slowly took my self away from the stimulus. If sunbathing, roll-over. Walk to the bathroom, or jump in the pool if there is one. I do disrespect those guys who walk around with and erection as if to say " look what i have"..
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old hippie
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Posted - 12/09/2005 : 3:39:51 PM
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. Why is it ? Every time this question is asked, those who have moderate to long-time experience in naturist settings say, effectively, "don't fret so much - it is not a great problem. No one will laugh, and if you are discreet no one will be bothered." And the questioner replies with some form of "That can't be true. I am very worried." In essence they are saying, 'I've never done this, but I know more about it than those who have.'
. I don't deny for a second the sense of apprehension: certainly every male naturist has had that whisper of doubt. But you'd think that after many testimonials to the effective victory of experience over prurience, a questioner would take the statements as valid.
. I sense that there is a MS in Phsychology lurking in here somewhere. Any budding grad students out there looking for a thesis topic?
Dum vivimus, vivamus!
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GeeWilly
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Posted - 12/13/2005 : 12:19:49 PM
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Thanks, Cheri. Because my reply is beyond the scope of this forum, that response is via the private e-mail channel available thanks to this site.
With apologies, Will
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A simple question? Arousal and etiquette...
