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gnarlyoldman
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Posted - 02/10/2014 : 09:46:21 AM
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quote: Originally posted by Nude in AK
OK folks, help me out here a little. I have enjoyed being nude off an on for many years, just I was a little more secretive about it. Since I have retired and am no longer in a position that I need to watch my "P & Q's" so to speak, I have been nude a LOT more often. However the wife has a completely different take on this and it is getting to her. Unlike me, she will not even get out of bed with out have a t-shirt, a hoodie and sweat pants on. Last summer she did not say much as I worked out side in the nude as much as possible. I would keep shorts close by for the 'chance' that someone might come by. It has gotten to the point that she believes that I need counseling. I have attempted to talk to her about my feelings but for the time being she is closed minded. Suggestions!
Wives worry more about "what will the neighbors think" and not about what makes her husband have a good life. Of course the neighbors wouldn't even know if she didn't tell them, but women are gossips so what she knows the woman down the street knows. It is her, not you that needs counseling, but counselors are all trained that women are right and men are bad. They side with the woman and gang up on the man. They also are trained to enforce cultural dogma, so DO NOT go see a counselor. Stand strong, go naked, and let her bitch all she likes. Eventually she will accept the man's decision if he doesn't apologize or kow tow to female tears or emotional manipulation.
Be well
Naked is green.
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Nude in AK
Forum Member
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Posted - 02/10/2014 : 10:01:03 AM
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Thanks all for the input and support. Things are still fluid and it will be interesting to see where this goes. I understand the different thought processes but hope that the wife relaxes a little more. What is interesting is that last summer I was nude most of the summer and had 'no tan lines' and the wife did not seems to care too much. She was concerned and requested that I have a pair of short close by, which was not a problem. That only made sense. Trying to get her to understand how good it feels to be working outside in the nude, at this time seems to be an uphill battle. OH well!
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Country: USA
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Diger
Forum Member
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Posted - 02/10/2014 : 3:49:51 PM
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Relax and think Baby Steps... you will not change her over night. It will take time so concentrate on small things first let her accept your nudity before working on her. A pool or hot tub will give her more of a reason to try skinny dipping. Something about that word sounds more acceptable than Nudist or Naturist. That's how I got Angie to give it a try, she really enjoyed skinny dipping in our little aboveground pool.
Don't give up hope she will surprise you someday.
Diger
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Horace
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Posted - 02/11/2014 : 08:20:24 AM
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I agree with Diger. Whenever anybody tries something new that they perceive as "risky" for whatever reason, they are going to be very cautious. My wife saw nudity outside the home as linked with sexual for a long time. At home in private, no problem. As visit to a c/o beach in the carribean really opened her eyes that being nude wasn't sexual. Within a day she was making friends and starting conversations on the beach just like she would when she is clothed. That said she is still body self concious any acutely aware of being observed. When she observes the gawkers wandering up and down the beach. She covers up. No free show! One thing that helped for me was when my wife early on complained about me being nude around the house I asked her to read up on it and to really think about what harm was I causing. She also has seen how. "Naked time". Really relaxes us, shedding the stresses of the "real" world. My buddy and I even had a men's "spa" nite the other night. We took a sauna and then relaxed in the hot tub with a scotch and a cigar. All in -20F weather My friend agreed it was a great time and a great way to be nude outside in the dead of winter.
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Nudony
Forum Member
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Posted - 02/12/2014 : 08:40:05 AM
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quote: Originally posted by gnarlyoldman
[quote] It is her, not you that needs counseling, but counselors are all trained that women are right and men are bad. They side with the woman and gang up on the man. They also are trained to enforce cultural dogma, so DO NOT go see a counselor. Stand strong, go naked, and let her bitch all she likes. Eventually she will accept the man's decision if he doesn't apologize or kow tow to female tears or emotional manipulation.
Be well
Naked is green.
Not always!
This happened right around he time I was really exploring nudism, being nude at home much of the time and talking about social nudity with my gf on a frequent basis. She was at that stage where she was occasionally nude at home; but social nudity was a complete no-no. Anyway, we did some pre-marital counseling with our pastor. We talked about different things; and nudism came up, rather unexpectedly. My gf complained about feeling pressured to be socially nude. I was taken aback because I never figured I'd have to openly defend nudism; I figured I was in for a grilling. So I explained nudism to our pastor the best I could, from a personal and cultural viewpoint. I also emphasized that I was not pressuring her to be nude; I was merely encouraging her to be comfortable in her own nude skin.
The pastor listened intently to me; then turned to my gf and asked her what exactly her objection to social nudity was. She immediately talked about body acceptance, and the conversation turned to her body-shame; which she talked about intensively.
After he'd listened to both sides, the pastor's response was pretty unexpected. He encouraged me to be more attentive to my gf's body acceptance issues; BUT he also stated that he saw nothing wrong with the idea of social nudity, and advised my gf that perhaps it would be a good experience for her!
I think it was the way I "presented" nudism that made our pastor so open-minded about it. I was pretty articulate and educated about it! It didn't play a huge role in her decision to eventually try nudism; but the encouraging feedback from our pastor certainly stuck in her mind.
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