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Phydeau
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 Posted - 01/06/2008 : 10:25:39 PM
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Men are certainly free to respond to this as well, but I thought the title would get more attraction.
I've been trying to get at the heart of the disparity between men and women involved in naturism. From what I've been gathering, there's anywhere from a 2:1 to 10:1 ratio of men to women. In almost all cases, it seems men outweigh the women (except in places that have regulations to prevent that).
In trying to uncover why that is, it seems women have legitimate concerns (not surprisingly, a certain percentage of men actually ARE pigs, and unfortunately, it seems their numbers are only low at resorts because of the ratio.).
Now here's the thing: Men keep coming back. Obviously, it's not the ratio that's keeping them there, so keep that in mind.
I looked. Nobody's asked it the way I have. How do we fix this? Keep the pigs out? How? Get women to ignore the pigs? If the women stay, will the pigs leave? Ideas?
I'm preaching to the choir, sure, but the choir's educated, so shoot.
As The title suggests, I'm curious to know if and why any women here were nervous to get involved, and what won you over. Apparently, guys are easy (I can assure you, we're not).
(P.S. Thanks to another forum member for pointing me to the appropriate thread. Search wasn't working for me)
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Country: USA
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Diger
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Posted - 01/06/2008 : 11:18:45 PM
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I hate to tell you there's not much of a way to fix it. We just have to accept it as the way it is. For the reluctant spouce, the husbands have different ways and places for a first experience. One of the restricted resorts is always an option or a nude beach usualy has enough space to get some privacy but still be close to others. There is no easy way or no easy fix. The only good news is that when most women get to love the lifestyle they grow out of any issues about the gender balance thing.
Diger
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Country: USA
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McNigel
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Posted - 01/07/2008 : 04:25:40 AM
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quote:
In trying to uncover why that is, it seems women have legitimate concerns (not surprisingly, a certain percentage of men actually ARE pigs,
I have seen the opposite side of the coin. At Spanish resorts the families tend to go to the coast for the whole of the summer, with the husbands returning to the cities to work during the week. You also get groups of office workers (mostly female) arriving mid afternoon. So the ratio is often well over 2:1 female to male.
Given this ratio, the women then seem to gain confidence and feel dominant. Again it's only a few, but it's not just men who can act like pigs.
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Country: United Kingdom
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Phydeau
Forum Member
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Posted - 01/07/2008 : 06:15:44 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by McNigel
quote:
In trying to uncover why that is, it seems women have legitimate concerns (not surprisingly, a certain percentage of men actually ARE pigs,
I have seen the opposite side of the coin. At Spanish resorts the families tend to go to the coast for the whole of the summer, with the husbands returning to the cities to work during the week. You also get groups of office workers (mostly female) arriving mid afternoon. So the ratio is often well over 2:1 female to male.
Given this ratio, the women then seem to gain confidence and feel dominant. Again it's only a few, but it's not just men who can act like pigs.
Interesting. And good to know. Thanks. :)
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Country: USA
| Posts: 214 |
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Cheri
Forum Member
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Posted - 01/07/2008 : 09:03:00 AM
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Another reason is that women are told all the time, cover up. They've also been told by advertising that their bodies aren't as they should be, and women are more self-conscious that men. Also, men have PE classes, group showers, armed services,etc. that tend to make them less body conscious.
Just my 2 cents.
Cheri
Doing what I can to positively promote nudism
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go n nude
Forum Member
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Posted - 01/07/2008 : 10:50:58 AM
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Phydeau, I don't there's quick fix to attracting females, as Cheri's post says we are worlds apart.They been raised different,bombarded since birth with being prim and proper,having 5 sisters i know it was a totally different world for them. Yes there are some "pigs" everywhere no quick fix here either.Maybe time and understanding, they don't want to be treated like sex objects and just because they go nude, their not looking for it.To ignore the few "pigs" who spoil it for all, some say we'll have change mankind, so i say lets do it pronto and treat them respectfully always. Its a start towards equallity and betterment for every Body .I'm glad you asked these questions and i'm sure they're too. Change is possible it begins with us.
go n nude
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Country: Canada
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agde
Forum Member
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Posted - 01/07/2008 : 2:15:09 PM
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I do my little bit as a male, in clothed and unclothed contexts, by never letting another male get away with the slightest inappropriate comment. But of course, just like racial comments, they actually know better, so its often a matter of talking about what possibly in their head made them think such a thing. My theory is that if men have the right reflexes, women will have the option and experience to feel more comfortable and worry less about the male side of the gender equation.
Its actually more of a challenge with female friends who can sometimes be very quick to judge other women or themselves based on things like Cheri mentions. They are often taken aback by a guy being a knowledgeable radical egalitarian with a non-predatory, anti-objectification, fiercely protective outlook. After the initial shock, it usually brightens their day! 
If more men were outspoken in little daily ways, maybe we could help blunt upbringing and pervasive media stereotyping.
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Country: France
| Posts: 252 |
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melissastarr
Forum Member
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Posted - 01/07/2008 : 5:12:11 PM
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A male admitting that men are pigs- alright!!!! Now you're talking!!! OK, I'm under control now. Breathe easy, 1-2-3-4. I'm ok now, I think I can respond to the question.
First question, was I nervous to get involved? Absolutely. But not just because of the men, more because I was scared of me. I equated nudity with sex for a very long time and it was hard to get out of that mindset. I was scared that if I was nude I'd be raped (or gang-raped, if I was in a nudist environment.) Beyond that fear, I was scared that I wouldn't 'be right,' ie. that my body was too fat, not the right proportions, etc. I've seen TV and the movies and they just don't show imperfections there. Keep in mind, at the time I became a nudist I was exactly the right weight for my height and my proportions were optimal.
Second question, how do we get more women involved or better the male/ female ratio? I dunno, but I respect the question. I think part of it is teaching body acceptance to those around us. I think another part of it is not being shy about being a nudist with women around us- especially those of us who are women. As a woman myself, I think it's easier to share my being a nudist with men than with women because men are generally more accepting of it. But I need to share this with women, too, in hopes of being able to spread the message that every BODY is acceptable, unique, and special and there is nothing to hide in the way God created us. I've opened the door of nudism discussion for my sisters now. I don't know if either of them will join me, but maybe they'll at least examine their preconceived notions of what kind of body is acceptable for showing.
Melissa
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"Be who you are and say how you feel because those who matter don't mind and those who mind don't matter" -Dr. Seuss
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Country: USA
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Taxman
Forum Member
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Posted - 01/07/2008 : 11:52:29 PM
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My two cents from the male side goes with the concept of how women were brought up.
Around here, we were late coming to the party. We raised two daughters but did not push nudism nor the concept that nude equals sex.
End result, one daughter most likely open to it or practicing it and the other not accepting per say yet.
Now that we are part time empty nesters, the wife has no problem being nude-that is until the cold air gets the best of her.
When dressed, she is bra-less in most cases-in and out of the house.
Have one daughter show up and she will be dressed plus where a bra if not wearing several layers of clothing.
When I inquire about this the answer right or wrong goes back to the basic issue of how her mother raised her.
In the end, she has no issue with nudism but still has some issues bridging her younger years of up bringing in regards to nudism and our daughters.
Yet on a pier to pier basis with friends or relatives, she seems not to have these issues as she does with our daughters.
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Country: USA
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nudewalker
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Posted - 01/08/2008 : 11:20:37 AM
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I don't think the question is how do we get women interested in nudity as much as how we can make women feel comfortable with their own bodies. Once again my wife picked up a scandal rag for "lite" reading and inside were photos (unflattering)of celebs with the usual array of fingerpointing those so called "trouble" spots. I've even heard Peyton Manning tell men 'unless your a pro-football player you won't have rock hard abs. And Cheri, just so you know PE classes were brutal for some younger men who were overweight or slower to mature. All I can say is be positive, supportive and careing.
We did see Lifetime Networks new show "Do I look good naked?" It was interesting how the woman saw herself compared to other women. I really enjoyed the computer images of the 'three' women dressed differently with the faces blocked out, but it was the same woman dressed differently. Hopefully, the confidence factor will rub off on others!
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Phydeau
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Posted - 01/08/2008 : 2:11:59 PM
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Believe me. P.E. was no picnic for me. My freshman year, I was about 80 pounds overweight, and was literally about as "developed" as a 3-year-old (which, given the extra fat in the area turned out to be a VERY bad combination). I only survived because it was the last period of the day and I could go home to shower. I ended up avoiding sports simply because I couldn't face the locker room (which did wonders for my weight loss). My sophomore year, puberty finally started catching up to me, but I still skipped lunch and waited for the showers to clear out.
Besides, girls take P.E. too, don't they? Or is that a newer thing? Or maybe just an American thing?
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Country: USA
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McNigel
Forum Member
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Posted - 01/08/2008 : 3:00:03 PM
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Is it that:
Women seem to have a complicated attitude to being seen naked. Whereas men cover themselves to avoid causing offence, but don't really see why.
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Country: United Kingdom
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George B
New Member
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Posted - 01/08/2008 : 3:58:30 PM
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My wife and I are both new to the nude beach My wife is the one who brought me to a beach in San Fransisco area and she was the one who was shy about getting undressed but I can see why women are more prone to cover up we had a couple of young guys come over and gawk at her too many rude people its ok to look after all we are all human and curious but gawking is rude so I geuss my responce is just that women want the freedom but dont like the rudness of some by the way I'm new today :-)
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Country: USA
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Phydeau
Forum Member
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Posted - 01/08/2008 : 4:42:03 PM
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Welcome, George! :) (I'm pretty new, myself)
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Country: USA
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melissastarr
Forum Member
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Posted - 01/08/2008 : 6:10:47 PM
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Many men I've met are in to 'sporting themselves' yet I've met very few women who do the same. Maybe it's a guy thing?
Melissa
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"Be who you are and say how you feel because those who matter don't mind and those who mind don't matter" -Dr. Seuss
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Country: USA
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CathyK
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Posted - 01/08/2008 : 7:23:32 PM
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Women's and men's brains a just wired differently. In different cultures all over the world it is the women who primp and wear makeup and show their legs and other body parts in general. Women are culturally the weaker more vulnerable sex. Western society has tried to equalize men and women in the women's "movement" but this in my opinion has only served to enhance the differences that remain...and there are many. Add to that the media's portrayal of the perfect women as a Victoria Secret model, and you simply cannot equalize how women react to a nude environment Vs how a man reacts.
Cathy
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