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Bor3dnudist
Forum Member
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Posted - 01/17/2009 : 03:11:36 AM
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[Deleted]
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Edited by - Bor3dnudist on 01/23/2014 08:42:02 AM
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Country: USA
| Posts: 11 |
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cuban
Forum Member
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Posted - 01/19/2009 : 04:37:17 AM
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Is your gf nude though when the neighbor is over? If so, then you definitely have a gripe.
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Country: USA
| Posts: 25 |
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tcan
Forum Member
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Posted - 01/19/2009 : 06:12:51 AM
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i know the feeling my wife walks around nude when we have company (our parents or siblings) but i dont know how she feel if i was to do the same.. i feel uncomfortable in my own house cant wait to people reply to this topic..
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Country: USA
| Posts: 13 |
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Balto Bob
$ Supporter
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HappyDaz
Forum Member
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Posted - 01/19/2009 : 11:46:10 AM
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Bob, I agree with your perspective. Bor3dnudist, if your girlfriend is nude in your home, I doubt it will come as a shock to your neighbor that you're a nudist too. It's your home and if you want to be nude be nude. I've made a practice of being nude at home for many years, I have two children one of whom is in college the other in high school. They understand we're nudists and we live accordingly (i.e. checking before my kids invite someone over, etc.). Take the first step and it'll become part of your life. Our friends and neighbors (anyone likely to 'stop by') know we're nudist and have either accepted our being nude or call before visiting. Many people are uncomfortable with nudity and I respect that, I don't go to their house and get nude. I in turn, expect people to respect the fact that I'm entitled to live a nudist lifestyle in my house. It's worked pretty well so far....
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Country: USA
| Posts: 69 |
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sailawaybob
Forum Member
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Posted - 01/19/2009 : 12:15:31 PM
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Another example of a double standard in this world, but it is you that is letting it happen. If she is uncomfortable with you being nude infront of the neighbor tell her that if you are to be clothed than so should she. And you are right if you want to walk around your house nude you are entitled to its your house I would warn friends to your state of dress before they visit though. I also agree with Balto Bob don't hide your nudity from your child, children especially young ones are natural nudist.
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Country: USA
| Posts: 1268 |
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HearthfireSpring
Forum Member
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Posted - 01/19/2009 : 5:08:23 PM
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My wife and I are having this issue right now. She was raised in a nudist household and she brought me into it. We have been in New Mexico for a few years helping my inlaws move into there new home and due to reasons of economy we are forced to stay with the inlaws for the time being. Now my wife was raised a nudist and is how she perfers to be and in the past we have been nude around the mother in law without problems. Our problem now is that she has decided that she no longer cares for the lifestyle and demands that we be dressed at all times. Now its her house and I have no problem with that but whenever shes hot or just doesen't want to ware clothing she strips breaking her own household rules. We are going to be leaving her home soon and the problem will go away but its still annoying.
Andy
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Country: USA
| Posts: 31 |
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Bor3dnudist
Forum Member
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Posted - 01/20/2009 : 01:07:07 AM
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[Deleted]
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Edited by - Bor3dnudist on 01/23/2014 08:42:19 AM |
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Country: USA
| Posts: 11 |
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Safebare
Forum Member
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Posted - 01/20/2009 : 3:45:03 PM
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How about getting a copy of Naturally, 'N' or other nudist/naturist magazine and use it to open the discussion further?
"Wearing nothing is devine, naked is a state of mind."
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Country: USA
| Posts: 105 |
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Balto Bob
$ Supporter
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Posted - 01/20/2009 : 4:06:10 PM
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I don't know your son but, kids seldom discuss what happens at home. The things we worry about they usually find quite boring. If he is a)under 10- he won't care and will most likely join you. b) older than 10- find HER nudity of some interest (as she is NOT his mother) but, probably not join you.
Bob Have a nice NUDE day !! www.flickr.com/photos/isisdc/2560300492/ www.flickr.com/photos/perspective/2560521247/
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Country: USA
| Posts: 830 |
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NudeAl
Forum Member
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Posted - 01/20/2009 : 9:32:03 PM
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If you can't do what you want to do in your own house where can you? Another thought if you let her set this as the standard now it will only get worse in the future. Tell her it is your house too and if she has no problem with her own nudity then you will also be nude, either that or allow her to dictate the rules to you in your own house. If she were covering up everytime the neighbor was over then I could tolerate that for a while but she is applying a double standard here and you are allowing it to happen. Do what you want I can only say I would not be able to accept that situation.
The woods are lovely, dark and deep, But I have promises to keep, And miles to go before I sleep, And miles to go before I sleep. -- Robert Frost
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Country: USA
| Posts: 457 |
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agde
Forum Member
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Posted - 01/22/2009 : 1:36:28 PM
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Sounds like it is time to solve what shouldn't really be a big-deal crisis.
How about just asking the neighbor if she minds, maybe something like "You know, we normally don't always wear clothes around the house, but I got in the habit of dressing up when you came over because I didn't know how comfortable you'd be seeing me in the buff. Would you mind terribly if I just stayed informal and the way I am when you drop by, rather than leaping to change clothes?" I bet she'll say something like, "It doesn't bother me if it doesn't bother you." Then you say, "Well, if you are ever uncomfortable, let me know."
By asking the neighbor, everybody is on the same page. And, for your gf, it both takes the "flasher" element out of it and gently sets a household rule-of-thumb that everyone just continues normally, clothed as they are, when the neighbor arrives, rather than making a big deal of it one way or the other. It is important and relaxing -- for everyone -- to establish home space as a comfy, no-big-deal clothing-optional zone. For your son too.
Frankly, everybody understands that all families have their own household culture, and anyone coming into your space as "extended family" naturally should expect to adapt to the ongoing family patterns.
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Country: France
| Posts: 252 |
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HappyDaz
Forum Member
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Posted - 01/22/2009 : 3:25:53 PM
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Great response agde. You hit the nail on the head with the statement 'everybody understands that all families have their own household culture,". Of all the people that we've told we're nudists, not one has reacted with shock or outrage. They simply accept it as who we are, and the way we choose to live our lives. The bigger deal you make of it, the bigger deal it becomes. I really like agde's courteous, matter-of-fact approach for your neighbor .
Bor3dnudist, how you make it okay with your your girlfriend? That's up to you in the end. But as Al points out, there seems to be a glaring double standard in your home. I wouldn't accept my wife's being nude as okay and my being nude as perverse and vice versa. We have close friends (female and couples) that have visited while we're both nude and it's not been a problem. Several friends have politely informed us, before visiting, that they'd be uncomfortable with our being nude. We've thanked them for their honesty and respected their wishes. Simple as that.
Cheers!
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Country: USA
| Posts: 69 |
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Bor3dnudist
Forum Member
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Posted - 01/23/2009 : 11:22:35 PM
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[Deleted]
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Edited by - Bor3dnudist on 01/23/2014 08:42:41 AM |
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Country: USA
| Posts: 11 |
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nudeisbetter
Forum Member
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Posted - 01/24/2009 : 03:13:14 AM
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There's a solution to the obvious double-standard if she "won't let" you be nude in your own house, but you'd probably miss her. Sorry, that kind of attitude really bothers me - IMO it is not her place to decide what you can and cannot do in your own home. Perhaps if she doesn't like you nude she should go visit the neighbor and let you be yourself in your house. As for the kid, I don't know what state you're in or what your relationship with his mother is, but you're absolutely right to play that as conservatively as possible - you could really leave yourself open to a world of trouble were he to say the wrong thing. It's not worth the risk.
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Country: USA
| Posts: 112 |
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Frank2233
Forum Member
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Posted - 01/24/2009 : 06:21:36 AM
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I agree it's your house, the neighbor drops over nightly. If your GF is nude then you should be nude as well, she must know your life style if your GF is nude when she drops over. I say go for it tell the neigbor that after a certen time in the evening you and your GF go nude. Enjoy life
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